Chocolate— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer needs to be clearer and more natural. Avoid unclear phrases like 'very polar' and 'shrimp healthy benefits'. Try to directly state your opinion and support it with clear reasons using correct vocabulary and grammar.

例: Yes, I really enjoy eating chocolate because it is very popular in my country and is often given as a gift. Moreover, chocolate contains antioxidants and can provide a quick energy boost, which makes it even more enjoyable for me.

提案: Your answer is unclear and contains grammatical errors. Try to give a direct answer about frequency and explain briefly when you eat chocolate, using simple and correct sentences.

例: I eat chocolate occasionally, usually when I feel a bit down. I try to limit it because I'm watching my diet.

提案: Your answer is generally clear but contains some grammatical mistakes. Try to use past tense correctly and organise your ideas more logically with linking words.

例: When I was a kid, I didn't eat chocolate very often because my parents thought it was expensive and preferred to buy healthy snacks. Therefore, I only had chocolate on special occasions.

提案: Your answer is confusing and contains many errors. Try to clearly explain why chocolate is popular, using correct vocabulary and linking words to connect your ideas.

例: I think chocolate is popular worldwide because it tastes delicious and can improve people's mood. For example, many people eat chocolate to feel happier. Additionally, chocolate contains natural ingredients like cocoa, which some studies suggest have health benefits.

提案: Your answer is unclear and contains incorrect words. Try to clearly state your favourite flavour and explain why, using appropriate vocabulary and grammar.

例: I prefer dark chocolate because it has a richer taste and contains less sugar than milk chocolate. Since I am trying to lose weight, I choose dark chocolate to enjoy a treat without feeling guilty.

提案: Your answer is difficult to understand due to unclear phrasing. Try to express your opinion clearly and give a simple reason with an example, using correct grammar.

例: Yes, I think giving chocolate as a gift is a good way to show respect and affection. Many people choose chocolate to express their feelings, especially on special occasions like Valentine's Day.

× I really enjoy eating the chocolate because it is very polar in my countries and is often given as a gift.

✓ I really enjoy eating chocolate because it is very popular in my country and is often given as a gift.

The word 'polar' is incorrect here; the correct adjective is 'popular' to describe something liked by many people. Also, 'countries' should be singular 'country' if referring to one, and 'the chocolate' is unnecessary; 'chocolate' is uncountable here.

× Additionally, chocolate has shrimp healthy benefits such as inflammatory and providing energy with makes it even more enjoyable for me.

✓ Additionally, chocolate has some healthy benefits such as reducing inflammation and providing energy, which makes it even more enjoyable for me.

The phrase 'shrimp healthy benefits' is incorrect; likely intended 'some healthy benefits'. 'Inflammatory' is an adjective meaning causing inflammation; the correct term is 'reducing inflammation'. The phrase 'with makes' is ungrammatical; 'which makes' is correct.

× Is depends on but I'm sometimes I am eating the chocolate when my when I'm down and yeah, I I am in the process of keeping the chef or I'm saving.

✓ It depends, but sometimes I eat chocolate when I'm feeling down, and yeah, I am in the process of keeping the chef or I'm saving.

The original sentence is fragmented and unclear. 'Is depends on' is incorrect; 'It depends' is correct. 'I am eating the chocolate when my when I'm down' is ungrammatical; 'I eat chocolate when I'm feeling down' is clearer. The latter part is unclear but kept as is due to lack of context.

× Hmm, when I was a kid I did eating chocolates very often because my parents really bought it for me and they say it's quite expensive at this time so they prefer to spend money on healthy snacks.

✓ Hmm, when I was a kid I ate chocolates very often because my parents really bought them for me and they said it was quite expensive at that time so they preferred to spend money on healthy snacks.

'Did eating' is incorrect; simple past 'ate' is correct. 'Bought it' should be 'bought them' as chocolates are plural. 'Say' should be past tense 'said' to match past context. 'At this time' should be 'at that time'. 'Prefer' should be past tense 'preferred'.

× As a result, I only have chocolate on special occasions.

✓ As a result, I only had chocolate on special occasions.

Since the context is past (when the speaker was a kid), the verb should be in past tense 'had' instead of present 'have'.

× Uh, I think chocolate is popular, right? Because it stay delicious and can influence people who mood.

✓ Uh, I think chocolate is popular, right? Because it stays delicious and can influence people's mood.

'It stay' should be 'it stays' to agree with third person singular. 'People who mood' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'people's mood' using possessive form.

× For example, many people enjoy eating the chocolates and tricks to feel the happier or more glass.

✓ For example, many people enjoy eating chocolates and tricks to feel happier or more glad.

'The chocolates' is incorrect; 'chocolates' without 'the' is better here. 'The happier' should be 'happier' without 'the'. 'More glass' is incorrect; likely intended 'more glad' or 'more joyful'.

× Umm and additionally, chocolate container natural ingredients like cocoa, which is study suggests health.

✓ Umm, and additionally, chocolate contains natural ingredients like cocoa, which studies suggest are healthy.

'Chocolate container' should be 'chocolate contains'. 'Which is study suggests health' is ungrammatical; correct form is 'which studies suggest are healthy'.

× I sometimes eating it in the chocolate, but I prefer dark chocolate because it's the bridge and is heavier than the milk chocolate.

✓ I sometimes eat chocolate, but I prefer dark chocolate because it's bitter and heavier than milk chocolate.

'I sometimes eating it in the chocolate' is incorrect; 'I sometimes eat chocolate' is correct. 'It's the bridge' is incorrect; likely meant 'it's bitter'. 'The milk chocolate' should be 'milk chocolate' without 'the'.

× Since I'm trying to lose my weight, I choose a chocolate with less cigarette with heavy.

✓ Since I'm trying to lose weight, I choose chocolate with less sugar and fat.

'Less cigarette with heavy' is incorrect and nonsensical. Likely intended 'less sugar and fat'. 'My weight' is better as 'weight' in this context.

× Enjoy a drink without feeling guilty.

✓ I enjoy a drink without feeling guilty.

The original sentence lacks a subject; adding 'I' makes it a complete sentence.

× Yeah, I think that's is a good way for showing that's respect or showing that feeling for everyone because the many people have the couple or the health significant relationships that they choose then they give for showing their feelings and yeah, for example in the final ties something.

✓ Yeah, I think that's a good way to show respect or feelings for everyone because many people have couples or significant relationships, so they choose to give gifts to show their feelings, for example, on special occasions.

The sentence is fragmented and contains incorrect pronouns and articles. 'That's is' should be 'that's'. 'Showing that's respect' should be 'to show respect'. 'The many people' should be 'many people'. 'The couple or the health significant relationships' is unclear; corrected to 'couples or significant relationships'. 'They choose then they give for showing their feelings' is rephrased for clarity. 'Final ties something' is unclear; replaced with 'special occasions'.