Chocolate— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Try to use more natural expressions and avoid awkward phrases like "adore to eat" and "helps to swing my mood." Also, keep your answer concise and clear by avoiding redundancy.

例: Yes, I really enjoy eating chocolate because it instantly lifts my mood and makes me feel very happy.

提案: Focus on clear sentence structure and avoid filler words. Use linking words like "usually" or "also" to connect ideas smoothly. Be specific about frequency and reasons.

例: I usually eat chocolate about once a week, especially when I'm feeling stressed or as a reward when I get good grades.

提案: Avoid repeating words and unclear phrases. Use past tense consistently and provide specific details. Try to make your answer more concise and natural.

例: When I was a kid, I loved eating chocolate because it was a sweet snack that many children enjoyed.

提案: Clarify your ideas and use appropriate vocabulary. Avoid unclear phrases like "success Buster activity" and explain reasons logically with linking words such as "because" and "also."

例: Chocolate is popular worldwide because it tastes sweet and delicious, and it often makes people feel happy and satisfied.

提案: Use correct grammar and avoid redundancy. Provide clear reasons and use linking words to connect your ideas smoothly.

例: My favorite chocolate flavor is choco vanilla because it's popular, affordable, and it helps me feel refreshed and less stressed.

提案: Use more natural expressions and avoid awkward phrases like "very optimistic" and "show the alarm." Be clear and concise when explaining your opinion.

例: Yes, I think chocolate makes a great gift because it shows affection and most people enjoy eating it.

× Definitely, I adore to eat chocolate.

✓ Definitely, I adore eating chocolate.

The verb 'adore' is followed by a gerund (-ing form) rather than an infinitive. Therefore, 'adore to eat' is incorrect; it should be 'adore eating'. This is a common pattern with verbs expressing likes or dislikes.

× Well, it helps to swing my mood and by eating the chocolate I feel over the moon.

✓ Well, it helps swing my mood and by eating chocolate I feel over the moon.

The verb 'help' can be followed by the base form without 'to'. Also, 'the chocolate' is unnecessary here; 'chocolate' as a general substance does not need an article. The phrase 'helps to swing' should be 'helps swing'.

× Will I eat a chocolate once a week?

✓ I eat chocolate once a week.

The question 'Will I eat...' is incorrect in this context. The student is answering a question about frequency, so a simple present tense statement is appropriate. Also, 'a chocolate' is incorrect when referring to chocolate in general; 'chocolate' without an article is correct.

× As a as whenever I feel very suppressed then at that time I prefer to eat chocolate.

✓ Whenever I feel very stressed, I prefer to eat chocolate at that time.

The phrase 'As a as' is incorrect and redundant. Also, 'suppressed' is not the correct word here; 'stressed' is appropriate to express feeling under pressure. The sentence structure is improved by removing unnecessary words and placing the time expression at the end.

× whenever I get a a good marks then I prefer to eat a chocolate.

✓ whenever I get good marks, I prefer to eat chocolate.

'Marks' is plural, so 'a' should not be used before it. Also, 'a chocolate' is incorrect when referring to chocolate in general. The sentence is corrected by removing the article before 'good marks' and 'chocolate'.

× As far as I know when I was a kid then I love to eat the chocolate as as we know that the most of the kids like to eat the sweet dishes so so the chocolate is just act as a snack for me at that time.

✓ As far as I know, when I was a kid, I loved to eat chocolate because most kids like to eat sweet dishes, so chocolate just acted as a snack for me at that time.

The sentence mixes past and present tense incorrectly. Since the time is in the past ('when I was a kid'), the verb 'love' should be in past tense 'loved'. Also, 'the most of the kids' should be 'most kids'. 'Is just act' should be 'just acted' to match past tense. Articles before 'chocolate' are unnecessary here.

× So I eat a chocolate very much when I was a kid.

✓ So I ate a lot of chocolate when I was a kid.

The verb 'eat' should be in past tense 'ate' to match 'when I was a kid'. Also, 'a chocolate' is incorrect; 'a lot of chocolate' is the correct quantifier. 'Very much' is less natural here than 'a lot of'.

× I think that the chocolate is very popular in all over the world because it act as a it act as a success Buster activity.

✓ I think that chocolate is very popular all over the world because it acts as a success booster activity.

'The chocolate' is incorrect when speaking generally; 'chocolate' without 'the' is correct. 'In all over the world' should be 'all over the world'. The verb 'act' should be 'acts' to agree with singular subject 'it'. 'Buster' should be 'booster'.

× Apart from this, by eating the chocolate, the individual can associate their taste bud.

✓ Apart from this, by eating chocolate, an individual can stimulate their taste buds.

'Associate their taste bud' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'stimulate their taste buds'. Also, 'the chocolate' is unnecessary; 'chocolate' is sufficient. 'Taste bud' should be plural 'taste buds'.

× Apart from this, it's too sweet.

✓ Apart from this, it's very sweet.

'Too sweet' implies an excessive amount which may be negative; 'very sweet' is more appropriate to express a positive attribute. This is a word choice issue related to adverbs.

× The favorite flavor of chocolate that I like it very much is choco vanilla.

✓ My favorite flavor of chocolate is choco vanilla.

The phrase 'that I like it very much' is redundant and incorrect because 'it' refers back to the flavor already mentioned. The sentence is clearer and grammatically correct without this phrase.

× Well, it is very popular in all over the world and it's not very expensive and by eating this chocolate, I feel very refresh, feel very happier and stress free.

✓ Well, it is very popular all over the world and it's not very expensive, and by eating this chocolate, I feel very refreshed, happier, and stress-free.

'In all over the world' should be 'all over the world'. 'Feel very refresh' is incorrect; the adjective form 'refreshed' is needed. 'Feel very happier' is incorrect; 'happier' alone suffices. 'Stress free' should be hyphenated as 'stress-free'.

× Definitely it is very it is very optimistic to use the chocolate as a gift to another one as we can show the love and as we know that the most of the people like to eat the chocolate so by giving the chocolate it helps to. Show the alarm.

✓ Definitely, it is very appropriate to use chocolate as a gift to others because we can show love, and since most people like to eat chocolate, giving it helps to show affection.

'Optimistic' is incorrectly used; 'appropriate' fits better. 'Another one' should be 'others'. The phrase 'helps to show the alarm' is incorrect and unclear; 'helps to show affection' or 'love' is more appropriate. The sentence is restructured for clarity and correctness.