Chocolate— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Câu trả lời của bạn có nhiều từ ngữ thừa và lặp lại, gây mất tự nhiên. Bạn nên trả lời trực tiếp, rõ ràng và tránh sử dụng các từ ngữ không cần thiết như "uh". Ngoài ra, hãy sử dụng câu có cấu trúc rõ ràng với câu chủ đề và chi tiết hỗ trợ cụ thể hơn.

例: I don't like eating chocolate because it makes me feel tired and gives me headaches. Instead, I prefer strawberries and vegetables since they taste fresher and healthier.

提案: Bạn nên tránh lặp lại ý đã nói trước đó và trả lời câu hỏi một cách trực tiếp hơn. Hãy sử dụng câu ngắn gọn, rõ ràng và thêm một chút chi tiết để câu trả lời sinh động hơn.

例: I rarely eat chocolate, maybe once or twice a year, because I don't enjoy its taste much.

提案: Câu trả lời có lỗi ngữ pháp và cấu trúc câu chưa rõ ràng. Bạn nên sử dụng câu đơn giản, tránh lỗi sai và dùng liên từ phù hợp để câu mạch lạc hơn.

例: When I was a child, I ate chocolate more often because my sister, who is a flight attendant, brought me chocolates from her trips to Japan and Korea.

提案: Câu trả lời thiếu sự rõ ràng và có nhiều lỗi ngữ pháp. Bạn nên sử dụng câu hoàn chỉnh, tránh lỗi sai và dùng từ vựng phù hợp để diễn đạt ý tưởng một cách logic và tự nhiên.

例: I think chocolate is popular worldwide because it provides quick energy, which helps people stay focused and productive while working or studying.

提案: Bạn nên tránh sử dụng các từ ngữ thừa và nói rõ ràng hơn. Hãy trình bày câu trả lời có cấu trúc tốt với câu chủ đề và chi tiết hỗ trợ cụ thể.

例: My favourite flavour is milk chocolate because it is sweet and doesn't cause me any discomfort, unlike dark chocolate which sometimes makes me feel tired and gives me headaches.

提案: Câu trả lời có nhiều từ ngữ thừa và lặp lại. Bạn nên trả lời trực tiếp, tránh sử dụng các từ như "uh" và làm câu trả lời mạch lạc hơn bằng cách sử dụng liên từ phù hợp.

例: Yes, I think chocolate is a great gift, especially on Valentine's Day, because it is a sweet and romantic gesture for your loved one.

× when I eat chocolate I feel very tired and headache

✓ when I eat chocolate I feel very tired and have a headache

The word 'headache' is a countable noun and requires an article or a verb to be grammatically correct. The phrase 'feel headache' is incorrect; it should be 'have a headache'. This corrects the singular noun usage and verb agreement.

× I like, uh, strawberry or veg more than chocolate

✓ I like, uh, strawberries or vegetables more than chocolate

The nouns 'strawberry' and 'veg' should be in plural form when referring to them generally. 'Veg' is informal and should be replaced with 'vegetables' for clarity and correctness.

× Ah, I'm not really eating chocolate because as I said, I'm not really into chocolate

✓ Ah, I don't really eat chocolate because, as I said, I'm not really into chocolate

The present continuous tense 'I'm not really eating' is incorrect here because the sentence refers to a habitual action. The simple present tense 'I don't really eat' is appropriate for habits.

× When I was young, I ate chocolate more often than when I older

✓ When I was young, I ate chocolate more often than when I was older

The phrase 'when I older' is missing the verb 'was' to form the past tense. The correct form is 'when I was older' to indicate a past time comparison.

× my sister is a flight attendant and she's bought a lot of chocolate from the chip in the flight to Japan or Korea

✓ my sister is a flight attendant and she buys a lot of chocolate from the shop on the flight to Japan or Korea

The present perfect 'she's bought' is incorrect here because the sentence describes a habitual action. The simple present 'she buys' is appropriate. Also, 'chip' is a typo and should be 'shop'.

× she's bought a lot of chocolate from the chip in the flight to Japan or Korea

✓ she buys a lot of chocolate from the shop on the flight to Japan or Korea

The preposition 'in' is incorrect when referring to being on a flight. The correct preposition is 'on' to indicate location during a flight.

× so I usually eat her present

✓ so I usually eat her presents

The word 'present' should be plural 'presents' when referring to multiple gifts. This corrects the singular/plural agreement.

× I think chocolate popular rather work because it's get people energy quickly to work or study and help people more help people have focus a contribute on what they are doing

✓ I think chocolate is popular because it gives people energy quickly to work or study and helps people focus and contribute to what they are doing

The original sentence has multiple structural errors including missing verbs, incorrect word order, and redundancy. Adding 'is' after 'chocolate', changing 'get' to 'gives', and restructuring the sentence improves clarity and grammatical correctness.

× I like sweet chocolate, like milk chocolate because uh, it uh, 100% uh, cacao chocolate make me feel uh, tired and sometimes I get a headache after I eating chocolate

✓ I like sweet chocolate, like milk chocolate, because 100% cacao chocolate makes me feel tired and sometimes I get a headache after eating chocolate

The verb 'make' should be 'makes' to agree with the singular subject '100% cacao chocolate'. Also, 'after I eating' is incorrect; it should be 'after eating'. Removing filler words improves sentence clarity.

× after I eating chocolate

✓ after eating chocolate

The phrase 'after I eating' is incorrect because 'after' should be followed by a gerund ('eating') without a subject pronoun. The correct form is 'after eating chocolate'.

× Especially using chocolate as a gift in Valentine's is a, is very, uh, special to your lover

✓ Especially using chocolate as a gift on Valentine's Day is very special to your lover

The preposition 'in' is incorrect for holidays; 'on' is used for specific days. Also, 'Valentine's' should be 'Valentine's Day' for clarity. The modal verb usage is acceptable but the sentence needed preposition correction.

× And yeah, uh, giving chocolate like as a gift is very romantic with me

✓ And yeah, giving chocolate as a gift is very romantic to me

The phrase 'like as a gift' is incorrect; it should be 'as a gift'. Also, 'romantic with me' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'romantic to me'. This corrects sentence structure and preposition usage.