Chocolate— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is a bit unclear and contains grammatical errors. Try to make your response more natural and concise by directly answering the question first, then giving specific reasons with clear linking words. Avoid redundancy and unclear phrases.

例: No, I do not like eating chocolate very much because in my village, there are not many brands available. Therefore, I have to travel to another city to buy chocolates, which is inconvenient. Also, I feel that authentic chocolate is hard to find here.

提案: Your answer is unclear and incomplete. Try to answer directly and use linking words to explain reasons. Keep your sentences grammatically correct and avoid unnecessary repetition.

例: I rarely eat chocolate because there are no shops selling it in my village. I have to go to another city to buy some, so I don't get the chance often.

提案: Your answer has some grammatical mistakes and unclear phrases. Try to structure your answer with a clear topic sentence and supporting details using linking words. Be specific about your childhood experience.

例: No, I did not eat chocolate often as a kid because my mother was strict about eating store-bought sweets. She believed they could harm my teeth and health, so I rarely had chocolate during my childhood.

提案: Your answer has good ideas but needs clearer expression and better linking words. Try to avoid hesitation and use complete sentences with relevant vocabulary to explain your opinion.

例: I think chocolate is popular worldwide because it helps people satisfy their cravings. Additionally, some chocolates, especially those with pure cocoa, can boost mood hormones and help relieve stress.

提案: Your answer is somewhat fragmented and contains grammatical errors. Try to give a clear topic sentence followed by supporting details using linking words. Be specific about your favourite flavour and why you like it.

例: My favourite flavour of chocolate is vanilla. It was the first flavour I tried, recommended by my elder brother who worked in the city. Since then, I have liked it the most.

提案: Your answer has good content but is broken into short, incomplete sentences. Try to speak in complete sentences with clear linking words to make your answer more natural and effective.

例: In my personal experience, I have given chocolates to my girlfriend as gifts to express my love. I believe chocolate is a good gift because it helps convey feelings to others.

× there are not much brands available of chocolate

✓ there are not many brands of chocolate available

The quantifier 'much' is used with uncountable nouns, but 'brands' is a countable noun, so 'many' should be used instead.

× there is no authentic chocolate available Porch over it available

✓ there is no authentic chocolate available or anything like that

The phrase 'Porch over it available' is incorrect and unclear. It seems the speaker meant 'or anything like that' to express the absence of authentic chocolate.

× there is no shop that has chocolate

✓ there is no shop that has chocolates

'Chocolate' can be uncountable, but here it refers to countable items (chocolate products), so plural 'chocolates' is more appropriate.

× I don't get. Anytime to buy some chocolates?

✓ I don't get any time to buy some chocolates.

The original sentence is fragmented and unclear. It should be combined into a complete sentence to convey the intended meaning.

× my mother always used to nag me about note taking, eating things that was purchased from the shop

✓ my mother always used to nag me about not eating things that were purchased from the shop

'Note taking' is incorrect here; it should be 'not eating'. Also, 'was' should be 'were' to agree with plural 'things'.

× because that will have my teeth, my body and so I was very strictly

✓ because that would harm my teeth and my body, and so I was very strict

The original sentence is incomplete and unclear. 'Will have my teeth' is incorrect; it should be 'would harm my teeth'. Also, 'strictly' is an adverb but 'strict' (adjective) is needed here.

× Upbringing where I was from a strict upbringing

✓ I was brought up in a strict upbringing

The phrase 'Upbringing where I was from a strict upbringing' is incorrect. The correct expression is 'I was brought up in a strict upbringing'.

× many people also chocolate to improve their health

✓ many people also eat chocolate to improve their health

The verb 'eat' is missing before 'chocolate' to complete the sentence meaningfully.

× Chocolate can boost your mood hormone an help you relieve your stress

✓ Chocolate can boost your mood hormones and help you relieve your stress

'Mood hormone' should be plural 'mood hormones' and 'an' is a typo for 'and'.

× I really hadn't heard any another flavor

✓ I really hadn't heard of any other flavor

'Any another' is incorrect; it should be 'any other'. Also, 'heard' is usually followed by 'of' when referring to flavors.

× I have given. My girlfriend many chocolates as a gift as a. As a piece of expressing my love toward her

✓ I have given my girlfriend many chocolates as a gift to express my love towards her

The original sentence is fragmented and has incorrect prepositions. 'As a piece of expressing' is incorrect; 'to express' is correct.