Chocolate— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Try to make your answer more natural and grammatically correct. Avoid redundancy and keep your answer concise. For example, say "Yes, I love chocolate because it makes me happy."

例: Yes, I love chocolate because it makes me happy and I enjoy its sweet taste.

提案: Be clear and direct in your answer. Avoid contradictory statements and incomplete sentences. Use linking words to connect ideas logically.

例: I usually eat chocolate once a week because I want to avoid cavities and maintain good dental health.

提案: Avoid fragmented sentences and unclear points. Use complete sentences and link your ideas smoothly. For example, explain the reason and consequence clearly.

例: Yes, I used to eat chocolate every day as a kid, but after getting cavities, I started to eat less to stay healthy.

提案: Organize your answer logically and avoid repetition. Use linking words to connect your points and provide specific reasons.

例: Chocolate is popular worldwide because it tastes delicious and is used in many treats like cakes and cookies, which many people enjoy.

提案: Clarify your points and avoid unclear phrases. Use correct vocabulary and complete sentences to explain your reasons.

例: My favourite flavour is dark chocolate because it is healthy and contains antioxidants that benefit the body.

提案: Make your answer more coherent by using linking words and avoid contradictory statements without explanation. Be specific about your opinion.

例: Yes, giving chocolate as a gift is nice because it makes many people happy, although some may not prefer it.

× Yes, I really love chocolates.

✓ Yes, I really love chocolate.

The word 'chocolate' is generally uncountable when referring to the food in general, so the plural 'chocolates' is incorrect here. Use the singular uncountable form 'chocolate' to express liking the substance.

× And its source for hapiness for me.

✓ And it's a source of happiness for me.

The contraction 'its' is possessive, but here the intended meaning is 'it is', so 'it's' should be used. Also, 'source for happiness' is incorrect; the correct preposition is 'source of happiness'. Additionally, 'hapiness' is misspelled; correct spelling is 'happiness'.

× I don't eat it a lot, like every single day. Maybe I eat chocolates once a week because I'm trying to avoid having cavities.

✓ I don't eat it a lot, like every single day. Maybe I eat chocolate once a week because I'm trying to avoid having cavities.

Again, 'chocolates' is incorrect when referring to the food generally; use the uncountable singular 'chocolate'.

× There's some people who don't like it, but almost everyone like it.

✓ There are some people who don't like it, but almost everyone likes it.

'Some people' is plural, so 'there's' (there is) is incorrect; use 'there are'. Also, 'everyone' is singular and requires the verb 'likes' with 's' for subject-verb agreement.

× almost everyone like it.

✓ almost everyone likes it.

The subject 'everyone' is singular and requires the verb to be in third person singular form 'likes'.

× Chocolate is. Very delicious. Cakes. Cookies.

✓ Chocolate is very delicious. Cakes and cookies too.

The original sentence is fragmented and unclear. Combining the fragments into complete sentences improves clarity and grammatical correctness.

× Second of all it has a light a lot of neutral insurance that helps your body.

✓ Second of all, it has a lot of nutrients that help your body.

The phrase 'a light a lot of neutral insurance' is incorrect and unclear. Likely intended was 'a lot of nutrients'. Also, 'helps' should be plural 'help' to agree with plural 'nutrients'.

× and it's very good if you want to stay healthy and fit and take off, take.

✓ and it's very good if you want to stay healthy and fit and lose weight.

The phrase 'take off, take' is incomplete and unclear. Replacing it with 'lose weight' fits the context and corrects the sentence.

× It's gonna make some people happy and some people angry because not everyone accepts chocolates as a gift.

✓ It's going to make some people happy and some people angry because not everyone accepts chocolate as a gift.

'Gonna' is informal; 'going to' is preferred in formal speech. Also, 'chocolates' should be 'chocolate' as an uncountable noun here.