Memory— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is generally clear but contains some repetition ('preoccupied preoccupied') and minor grammatical errors ('remember thing' should be 'remember things'). Try to avoid redundancy and ensure grammatical accuracy. Also, use linking words to connect your ideas smoothly, for example, 'However' is good, but you could add 'because' to explain why your mind is preoccupied. Keep your answer concise and natural.

例: To be honest, I was better at memorising things when I was younger because my mind was less busy. However, these days, I find it harder to remember things as I am often preoccupied with work-related concerns, such as how to earn money.

提案: Your answer is unclear and contains several errors and hesitations. Try to respond directly and clearly to the question. Avoid filler words like 'umm' and ensure your sentences are grammatically correct. Use specific examples and linking words to make your answer coherent. For instance, you could say you rarely forget important dates like family birthdays or anniversaries.

例: Not really, I usually remember important dates such as family birthdays and anniversaries because I make a point of noting them down in my calendar.

提案: Your answer is relevant but could be improved by adding more detail and using linking words to connect your ideas. Also, try to avoid repeating 'I need to remember' twice in one sentence. Instead, use conjunctions or pronouns to make your answer more natural and fluent.

例: At the moment, I need to remember a special date as well as the passwords for my various accounts, which can be quite challenging.

提案: Your answer is somewhat unclear and contains grammatical errors. Try to answer directly and clearly, explaining your method of remembering important things. Use linking words to connect your ideas and provide specific examples. Avoid phrases like 'I don't know how' which can sound uncertain.

例: I usually remember important things naturally, such as my birthday and my family's birthdays, because they are significant to me and I often think about them.

× So I find it harder to remember thing as well as before.

✓ So I find it harder to remember things as well as before.

The word 'thing' should be plural 'things' because it refers to multiple items that need to be remembered. Using the singular form here is incorrect when talking about general memory.

× my mind is often preoccupied preoccupied with work related concerns like how to earn money.

✓ my mind is often preoccupied with work-related concerns like how to earn money.

The phrase 'work related' should be hyphenated as 'work-related' because it is a compound adjective describing 'concerns'. Also, the repeated word 'preoccupied' is a typographical error and should appear only once.

× Not really, I usually remember for example the special day umm like the wise birthdays while families birthdays or anniversary for the Marriott.

✓ Not really, I usually remember, for example, special days like wise birthdays, family birthdays, or anniversaries for the Marriott.

The sentence incorrectly uses singular forms 'day', 'birthdays', 'families birthdays', and 'anniversary' inconsistently. It should be plural 'days', 'birthdays', 'family birthdays', and 'anniversaries' to correctly refer to multiple occasions. Also, 'families birthdays' should be 'family birthdays' as 'family' is used attributively here.

× I would like to tell you the my mind remember the important things in daily life.

✓ I would like to tell you that my mind remembers the important things in daily life.

The phrase 'the my mind' is incorrect; 'the' should be removed. Also, 'remember' should be 'remembers' to agree with the singular subject 'mind'. Additionally, 'that' is needed to introduce the clause properly.

× I would like to tell you the my mind remember the important things in daily life.

✓ I would like to tell you that my mind remembers the important things in daily life.

The verb 'remember' must be in the third person singular form 'remembers' to agree with the singular subject 'mind'.