Patience— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is somewhat clear but contains grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. Try to use simpler, correct sentences and avoid redundancy. Also, provide a clear topic sentence followed by supporting details using linking words for coherence.

例: To be honest, I am not a very patient person, especially when dealing with new or difficult things. For example, I often feel impatient when I spend a long time with my children. However, recently I have been trying to improve my patience to handle these challenges better.

提案: Your answer lacks clarity and contains grammatical mistakes. Use linking words to connect ideas and be more specific about what makes you impatient. Avoid vague phrases and ensure your sentences are complete and natural.

例: I often feel impatient and tired when I do housework or spend a long time with my daughter. Also, dealing with travel arrangements can make me feel stressed and impatient. However, I am trying to stay positive and manage these feelings better.

提案: Your answer is unclear and contains many grammatical errors and repetitions. Try to structure your response with a clear topic sentence and supporting details, using correct grammar and linking words to improve coherence.

例: How I feel when doing something for a long time depends on the situation. If it is something I enjoy, I feel happy and engaged. However, if it is something I dislike, I tend to feel tired and impatient.

提案: Your answer has grammatical mistakes and unclear phrases. Use correct verb forms and clearer expressions. Provide a direct answer followed by specific reasons or examples, linked logically.

例: Yes, I believe every job requires a lot of patience because we often have to deal with challenges, different situations, and people. Although I am not naturally very patient, I am working on developing this quality.

提案: Your answer is incomplete and contains grammatical errors and unclear phrases. Provide a clear, complete response with a topic sentence and supporting details, using linking words to show contrast between past and present.

例: Absolutely, I am more patient now than when I was a child. When I was younger, I often felt impatient when facing challenges or difficult tasks. However, now I can stay calm and handle such situations better.

× But I recently I try to improve my patience to face them more challenges.

✓ But recently I try to improve my patience to face more challenges.

The sentence incorrectly repeats 'I' after 'recently'. Also, 'them more challenges' is incorrect; it should be 'more challenges' without 'them'. The verb 'try' is in present tense which fits the context of a recent ongoing effort.

× Actually, I often fear impatient and tired when I do in housework and stay with my daughter for a long time.

✓ Actually, I often feel impatient and tired when I do housework and stay with my daughter for a long time.

The verb 'fear' is incorrect here; the correct verb is 'feel' to express emotions. Also, 'do in housework' is incorrect; it should be 'do housework' without 'in'.

× But now however, I try to stay positive and faced too.

✓ But now, however, I try to stay positive and face it too.

Using both 'but' and 'however' together is redundant; one is sufficient. Also, 'faced' is past tense but the sentence context requires present tense 'face'. Added 'it' for clarity.

× The feeling of doing something for a long time is really depend on the situation.

✓ The feeling of doing something for a long time really depends on the situation.

The verb 'depend' should be in third person singular present tense 'depends' to agree with the singular subject 'feeling'. Also, 'is really depend' is incorrect structure; 'really depends' is correct.

× If I if the things is I really want to do, I will feel happy and enjoyable.

✓ If the thing is something I really want to do, I will feel happy and enjoy it.

The sentence has repeated 'if' and incorrect word order. 'Things' should be singular 'thing' to match 'is'. 'Enjoyable' is an adjective; the correct verb form is 'enjoy' to express feeling.

× But if I don't, if I if the things is my dislike I will feel very impassioned and tired.

✓ But if I don't, if the thing is something I dislike, I will feel very impatient and tired.

Repeated 'if' is incorrect. 'Things' should be singular 'thing' to match 'is'. 'My dislike' is incorrect; 'I dislike' is correct. 'Impassioned' is incorrect here; the intended word is 'impatient'.

× Yes, actually every job should require a lot of patience because it often have deal with challenges, situation and people.

✓ Yes, actually every job should require a lot of patience because it often has to deal with challenges, situations and people.

The verb 'have' should be 'has' to agree with singular subject 'it'. Also, 'have deal' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'has to deal'. 'Situation' should be plural 'situations' to match the list.

× Also I'm not naturally very patient, I also developing myself and to be a patient person which has another patient.

✓ Also, I'm not naturally very patient; I am also developing myself to be a patient person who has more patience.

The phrase 'I also developing' is incorrect; it should be 'I am also developing' to use present continuous tense. 'Which has another patient' is incorrect; it should be 'who has more patience' to convey the intended meaning.

× I think I'm try to improve my patience and to be a patient person.

✓ I think I'm trying to improve my patience and to be a patient person.

The phrase 'I'm try' is incorrect; it should be 'I'm trying' to use present continuous tense correctly.

× I think that I'm not a really patient people because I usually feel very impatient when I face the challenge and to do difficult things, but now I can calm down when.

✓ I think that I'm not a really patient person because I usually feel very impatient when I face challenges and have to do difficult things, but now I can calm down.

'People' is plural; the singular form 'person' is needed here. 'The challenge' should be plural 'challenges' to generalise. 'To do difficult things' should be 'have to do difficult things' for correct expression. The sentence was incomplete; 'when' was removed to complete the thought.