Patience— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Try to avoid repetition and redundancy in your answer. Also, focus on clear sentence structure and grammar. Start with a direct response, then add a reason or example using linking words like 'because' or 'since'.

例: Yes, I consider myself a very patient person because my parents and grandparents always taught me that patience is a great virtue in life.

提案: Your answer is unclear and incomplete. Try to give a clear topic sentence and support it with specific examples. Use linking words to connect ideas and avoid repeating phrases.

例: I feel impatient when I have to wait for someone or when I am doing something important, because I dislike delays and want to finish tasks quickly.

提案: Avoid filler words like 'uh' and incomplete sentences. Give a clear answer with supporting details and use linking words to connect your ideas logically.

例: When I have to do something for a long time, I sometimes feel stressed and distracted because I start thinking about other important tasks I need to complete.

提案: Try to speak clearly and avoid grammatical errors. Give a direct answer and explain with specific details. Use linking words to make your answer coherent.

例: I am currently a student, so I don't have a job. However, studying requires patience because I have to wait several months for my semester results, which can make me feel impatient.

提案: Try to use correct tense and sentence structure. Provide a clear comparison and support it with reasons or examples. Use linking words like 'but' and 'because' to connect ideas.

例: Yes, I am more patient now than when I was a child because I have learned to wait calmly, and my family and friends often appreciate this quality in me.

× Yes, I found that I am very patient person and I have so many patients and I have too much patience level because of my parents and my upbringings.

✓ Yes, I found that I am a very patient person and I have so much patience because of my parents and my upbringing.

The word 'patient' needs an article 'a' before it as it is a singular countable noun. 'Patients' is incorrect here as it means sick people; the correct word is 'patience' which is uncountable. 'Patience level' is awkward; simply 'patience' is better. 'Upbringings' should be singular 'upbringing' as it refers to the general process.

× They they, my parents and my grandparents ever told me having more patience in life, it is one of the great thing.

✓ They, my parents and my grandparents, always told me that having more patience in life is one of the great things.

The sentence has repeated 'They'. 'Ever' is incorrectly used; 'always' fits better. The phrase 'told me having more patience' is incorrect; it should be 'told me that having more patience'. 'Thing' should be plural 'things' as it refers to one of many.

× I feel sometimes I'm sometimes I feel impatient, like waiting for someone or if I do something important then this situation I feel very impatient because I cannot wait for anything and for example, I cannot wait for the.

✓ Sometimes I feel impatient, like when waiting for someone or if I have to do something important. In these situations, I feel very impatient because I cannot wait for anything.

The sentence is repetitive and lacks clarity. 'I'm sometimes I feel' is redundant. The phrase 'then this situation I feel' is awkward; it should be 'in these situations, I feel'. The sentence ends abruptly and needs completion or removal of incomplete parts.

× I feel sometimes very stressed or distracted that I do something for a long time and uh, I and I just started waiting for the moment to do my important thing.

✓ Sometimes I feel very stressed or distracted when I have to do something for a long time, and I just start waiting for the moment to do my important task.

The adverb 'sometimes' should be placed at the beginning for clarity. 'That I do something' is incorrect; 'when I have to do something' is better. 'Started' should be 'start' to match present tense. 'Important thing' is vague; 'important task' is clearer.

× I uh, I did not did, I did not do any job, but in yes, of course, I'm pursuing student obviously.

✓ I did not do any job, but yes, of course, I am obviously a student pursuing my studies.

The phrase 'did not did' is incorrect; only 'did not do' is needed. 'I'm pursuing student' is incorrect; it should be 'I am a student pursuing'. The sentence structure is awkward and needs rephrasing for clarity.

× And this required me to be more patient because the results of every semester are come in the next few months.

✓ And this requires me to be more patient because the results of every semester come in the next few months.

The verb 'required' should be present tense 'requires' to match the ongoing situation. 'Are come' is incorrect; the correct form is 'come'.

× So this was the time I feel very impatient for my.

✓ So this is the time I feel very impatient about my results.

The tense should be present 'is' to match the ongoing situation. The sentence is incomplete; adding 'about my results' completes the thought.

× Yes, of course, in my childhood I cannot wait for anything, but now I have too much patience level.

✓ Yes, of course, in my childhood I could not wait for anything, but now I have a lot of patience.

'Cannot' should be past tense 'could not' to refer to childhood. 'Too much patience level' is incorrect; 'a lot of patience' is appropriate.

× And it was the great personality of me and my friends and my family also appreciate me for this patience level.

✓ And it is a great part of my personality, and my friends and family also appreciate me for this patience.

'Was' should be 'is' to indicate current state. 'The great personality of me' is incorrect; 'a great part of my personality' is better. 'My friends and my family also appreciate me' is correct but needs better flow.