Snacks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be concise and avoid repetition. Start with a clear topic sentence stating when you snack, then add one specific reason or habit with a linking word. Use varied vocabulary (e.g., "between meals" → "mid-morning or mid-afternoon") and limit to 2–3 sentences.

例: I usually have snacks mid-morning or mid-afternoon between meals. Because I eat light lunches and work long hours, I often need a small energy boost to stay focused.

提案: Correct grammar and be specific about which snacks you choose and why. Use one clear opinion sentence followed by a reason and an example. Avoid vague or unclear phrases and check verb forms and comparative adjectives.

例: I don’t think most snacks are healthy, so I only snack once a week. Instead, I choose yogurt or fruit because they are lower in sugar and more nutritious than chips.

提案: Keep it natural and concise: give a direct answer, one reason, and a brief reflection. Replace awkward phrasing (e.g., "didn't usually take snacks") with natural expressions and use linking words like "because" or "so".

例: No, I rarely snacked as a child because my parents restricted sweets. As a result, I developed healthier eating habits and still avoid frequent snacking today.

提案: Be specific and correct grammar. State your preferred snacks in one sentence, then add frequency and a short reason using linking words. Use precise vocabulary (e.g., "crispy potato chips," "occasionally").

例: I like crispy potato chips and other crunchy snacks, but they’re quite unhealthy. Therefore, I only eat them occasionally, about twice a month.

× I usually eat snacks between meals.

✓ I usually eat snacks between meals.

No grammatical error; sentence correctly uses the simple present to describe a habitual action.

× I often get hungry during meals because I usually have a small meal during the day and I have a lot of work to do, so I usually get hungry during the meal.

✓ I often get hungry between meals because I usually have only small meals during the day and I have a lot of work to do.

The original sentence repeats and conflicts ('during meals' vs 'during the meal') and is wordy. Change 'during meals' to 'between meals' to match common usage for snacking times; use plural 'meals' and 'only small meals' for clarity and correct article use. Remove repetitive clause 'so I usually get hungry during the meal.'

× I think it's not good for my health so I usually eating snack once a week and I prefer what tutorial and snacks because it is more healthier.

✓ I don't think it's good for my health, so I usually eat snacks only once a week, and I prefer healthy snacks because they are healthier.

Multiple errors: 'I think it's not good' is natural as 'I don't think it's good'. 'usually eating' wrong verb form; use simple present 'usually eat'. 'eating snack' needs plural or article: 'eat snacks' or 'eat a snack'. 'what tutorial and snacks' is unclear; likely intended 'healthy snacks'. 'more healthier' is comparative error: use 'healthier' or 'more healthy' but not both. Also subject-verb agreement for 'they are'.

× No, I didn't usually take snacks when I was a child because my parents didn't allow me to eat them, but I thanked my parents because it made my habits not eat snacks too much.

✓ No, I didn't usually eat snacks when I was a child because my parents didn't allow me to, but I'm thankful to them because it helped me avoid eating too many snacks.

Use 'eat' rather than 'take' for snacks in English. 'Thanked my parents' should be present feeling 'I'm thankful to them' or 'I thanked my parents' depending on context; here present gratitude fits. 'it made my habits not eat snacks too much' is ungrammatical; rephrase to 'it helped me avoid eating too many snacks.'

× Actually I live some kinds of potato chips and the snacks that is really crispy but it is very unhealthy so I usually take them like twice a month.

✓ Actually I like some kinds of potato chips and snacks that are really crispy, but they are very unhealthy, so I usually eat them about twice a month.

'live' is a typo for 'like'. 'some kinds of' is acceptable but follow with plural 'chips'. 'the snacks that is' has subject-verb disagreement; use 'snacks that are'. 'it is very unhealthy' should match plural 'they are very unhealthy'. 'take them' is wrong verb; use 'eat them'. 'like twice a month' is informal; 'about twice a month' is clearer.