Snacks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 回答不够连贯，表达重复且语法错误较多。建议简化句子结构，避免重复表达，并使用连接词使回答更自然流畅。

例: I usually eat snacks in the afternoon when I feel bored. Eating snacks helps me improve my mood and concentrate better on my studies.

提案: 表达不清晰，语法和词汇使用不准确。建议明确表达观点，使用正确的时态和词汇，并用连接词组织句子。

例: To be honest, I don't think eating snacks is healthy because I often eat many snacks in the afternoon, which makes me lose my appetite at dinner time.

提案: 回答不完整且语法错误严重。建议完整回答问题，注意时态一致，避免语法错误，并补充具体细节。

例: When I was a child, I didn't eat many snacks because my parents didn't allow me to eat too much at night. They believed it would harm my teeth and health.

提案: 回答较好，但句子较长且重复。建议使用连接词简化句子结构，避免重复表达，使回答更自然。

例: I like eating dark chocolate because it tastes sweet and gives me energy. It also helps improve my mood and makes me feel more energetic.

× I think I usually eat less on the afternoon and especially during the times I was starting because at that time I'm really I think I have really bored so I need to eat some snacks to make me have a good mood to concentrate on my study.

✓ I think I usually eat less in the afternoon and especially during the times I am starting because at that time I think I am really bored so I need to eat some snacks to make me have a good mood to concentrate on my study.

这里的时间是现在时态，应该用现在时态表达。'was starting' 应改为 'am starting'，'I have really bored' 应改为 'I am really bored'。另外，介词 'on the afternoon' 应改为 'in the afternoon'。

× I think I usually eat less on the afternoon and especially during the times I was starting because at that time I'm really I think I have really bored so I need to eat some snacks to make me have a good mood to concentrate on my study.

✓ I think I usually eat less in the afternoon and especially during the times I am starting because at that time I think I am really bored so I need to eat some snacks to make me have a good mood to concentrate on my study.

介词 'on the afternoon' 用法错误，正确用法是 'in the afternoon'，表示在下午这个时间段。

× To be honest I don't think eating snacks is healthy because I always choose it. A lot of snacks in on the afternoon and it will make me not feel sense of hungry when the time is on the dinner dinner time.

✓ To be honest, I don't think eating snacks is healthy because I always choose a lot of snacks in the afternoon and it makes me not feel hungry when it is dinner time.

这里 'will make me not feel sense of hungry' 结构不正确，应改为 'makes me not feel hungry'。'sense of hungry' 是错误搭配，正确表达是 'feel hungry'。另外，'in on the afternoon' 介词重复，应改为 'in the afternoon'。

× To be honest I don't think eating snacks is healthy because I always choose it. A lot of snacks in on the afternoon and it will make me not feel sense of hungry when the time is on the dinner dinner time.

✓ To be honest, I don't think eating snacks is healthy because I always choose a lot of snacks in the afternoon and it makes me not feel hungry when it is dinner time.

介词 'in on the afternoon' 重复，应去掉一个，正确用法是 'in the afternoon'。

× To be honest, when was a child I'm not eat a lot of snacks frequently because at night my parents didn't allowed me to eat a too much snacks.

✓ To be honest, when I was a child I didn't eat a lot of snacks frequently because at night my parents didn't allow me to eat too many snacks.

这里时态应为过去时，'was a child' 前应加主语 'I'，'I'm not eat' 语法错误，应改为 'I didn't eat'。'didn't allowed' 中 'allowed' 应为原形 'allow'。'a too much snacks' 中 'a' 不应出现，且 'much' 用于不可数名词，'snacks' 是可数名词，应改为 'too many snacks'。

× To be honest, when was a child I'm not eat a lot of snacks frequently because at night my parents didn't allowed me to eat a too much snacks.

✓ To be honest, when I was a child I didn't eat a lot of snacks frequently because at night my parents didn't allow me to eat too many snacks.

'too much' 用于不可数名词，'snacks' 是可数名词，应该用 'too many'。另外，'a too much' 结构错误，不能加 'a'。

× It will harm to my team and and harm to my healthy.

✓ It will harm my teeth and harm my health.

'harm to' 用法错误，'harm' 作为动词时后面直接接宾语，不需要介词 'to'。'team' 应为 'teeth'，'healthy' 应为名词 'health'。

× It will harm to my team and and harm to my healthy.

✓ It will harm my teeth and harm my health.

'team' 是单数名词，语境应为 'teeth'（牙齿，复数）。'healthy' 是形容词，需用名词 'health'。

× I really like to eat dark chocolate because I think it is sweet and can make me have energy to do lots of things and can improve my mood and so it will make me energetic.

✓ I really like to eat dark chocolate because I think it is sweet and can give me energy to do lots of things and can improve my mood, so it makes me energetic.

'can make me have energy' 结构不自然，改为 'can give me energy' 更地道。'will make me energetic' 改为 'makes me energetic'，保持时态一致。