Snacks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 你的回答表达了原因，但句子结构不够自然，且有语法错误。建议使用更自然的表达方式，避免重复“snack”，并且注意单复数形式。

例: I usually eat snacks when I feel sad because sweet treats can cheer me up.

提案: 回答中时态使用不当，且句子不够连贯。建议直接回答问题，使用正确时态，并用连接词使句子更流畅。

例: No, I don't think eating snacks is healthy because they are often too sweet and contain unhealthy ingredients, which can lead to heart problems or obesity.

提案: 回答中存在语法错误和表达不清的问题。建议使用过去时态，避免重复，句子简洁且逻辑清晰。

例: Yes, I often ate snacks when I was young. Whenever I went to the park or amusement park, I would ask my mom to buy me ice cream because I loved it.

提案: 回答中语法和表达不够自然，句子较长且缺少连接词。建议简化句子，使用连接词使表达更流畅。

例: I definitely like ice cream because it is delicious and helps me cool down and feel refreshed after exercising on a hot summer day.

× When I feel sad, I will want to eat snack because I think snack is very sweet and they can cheer me up sometimes.

✓ When I feel sad, I want to eat snacks because I think snacks are very sweet and they can cheer me up sometimes.

The use of 'will want' is incorrect here because the sentence describes a habitual action or general truth, so simple present tense 'want' is appropriate. Also, 'snack' should be plural 'snacks' to match the context of general snacks, and 'snack is' should be 'snacks are' to agree in number.

× No I didn't. I think the snack is too sweet and there are some unhealthy ingredients in it so it might cause a lot of heart problems or obesity sometimes.

✓ No, I don't. I think snacks are too sweet and there are some unhealthy ingredients in them, so they might cause a lot of heart problems or obesity sometimes.

The response 'No I didn't' is incorrect because the question is about current opinion, so present tense 'No, I don't' is appropriate. Also, 'the snack is' should be 'snacks are' to refer generally to snacks, and 'in it' should be 'in them' to agree with plural 'snacks'.

× Yes, when I was a child I was a big fan of snack and every time I went to the park or the garden or some amusement park, I will ask my mom to buy a ice cream for me because I really want to eat it them and have a very hard day.

✓ Yes, when I was a child I was a big fan of snacks and every time I went to the park or the garden or some amusement park, I would ask my mom to buy an ice cream for me because I really wanted to eat it and had a very hard day.

The sentence mixes tenses incorrectly. 'I will ask' should be 'I would ask' to indicate habitual past action. 'A ice cream' should be 'an ice cream' because 'ice' starts with a vowel sound. 'I really want to eat it them' is incorrect; 'it' or 'them' should be used consistently; here 'it' is correct for 'ice cream'. Also, 'have a very hard day' should be past tense 'had a very hard day' to match the past context.

× Definitely the ice cream, because ice cream not only delicious, but also it can cheer me up in a very hot day in summer after a long time sport, I want to some cold thing to come down, calm me down.

✓ Definitely ice cream, because ice cream is not only delicious, but it can also cheer me up on a very hot day in summer after a long time of sport. I want something cold to cool down and calm me down.

The sentence lacks the verb 'is' after 'ice cream'. The phrase 'in a very hot day' should be 'on a very hot day' (preposition correction). 'After a long time sport' should be 'after a long time of sport' to be grammatically correct. 'I want to some cold thing to come down' is incorrect; it should be 'I want something cold to cool down'. Also, 'calm me down' is better connected with 'and' to show two effects.