Snacks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 回答较为自然且内容相关，但句子结构有些重复，且部分表达不够地道。建议简化句子结构，避免冗余，并使用更准确的表达方式。

例: I usually eat snacks at night because there is a long gap between dinner and bedtime. For instance, while watching TV, I enjoy having chocolate, cake, or fruits, which makes the experience more relaxing.

提案: 表达存在语法错误和逻辑不清，且部分句子不通顺。建议注意时态和句子结构，明确表达观点，并使用连接词使内容连贯。

例: No, I don't think eating snacks is healthy because they contain a lot of sugar and unhealthy fats. Moreover, eating snacks at night can disrupt my sleep and harm my dental health.

提案: 时态使用错误，句子结构混乱，表达不够清晰。建议注意时态一致性，简化句子，并使用更准确的词汇表达观点。

例: Yes, I often ate snacks when I was a child because most children enjoy sweet foods. However, my mother didn't like this habit because it is bad for children's health and growth.

提案: 句子结构不完整，语法错误较多，表达不够自然。建议注意主谓一致，避免重复，使用更准确的词汇，并保持句子简洁。

例: I like sweet snacks such as cakes, candies, and pastries. Chocolate-flavored foods are my favorite. I often eat cake for breakfast because it keeps me full until lunch, but I know this habit is not very healthy.

× I often watch TV during this time and having snacks like chocolate or cake or fruits makes the experience more enjoyable and relaxing.

✓ I often watch TV during this time and having snacks like chocolate or cake or fruits makes the experience more enjoyable and relaxing.

此句中 'having' 应改为 'have'，因为前面是并列结构，动词应保持一致。正确句子应为：'I often watch TV during this time and have snacks like chocolate or cake or fruits to make the experience more enjoyable and relaxing.' 这里的错误属于动词形式错误，需使用动词原形。

× I often watch TV during this time and having snacks like chocolate or cake or fruits makes the experience more enjoyable and relaxing.

✓ I often watch TV during this time and have snacks like chocolate or cake or fruits to make the experience more enjoyable and relaxing.

动词并列时应保持形式一致，'having' 应改为 'have'。

× If I eat it at night, it will disrupt my sleeping and make me feel relaxed next day and in spite of my tooth and oral health.

✓ If I eat snacks at night, it will disrupt my sleep and make me feel tired the next day and harm my tooth and oral health.

代词 'it' 指代不明确，应直接使用 'snacks'。此外，'disrupt my sleeping' 应改为 'disrupt my sleep'，'make me feel relaxed next day' 语义错误，应为 'make me feel tired the next day'，'in spite of' 用法错误，应改为 'harm'。

× Yes, I often eat snacks when I was a child because I think most children like enjoy sweet foods and sugar treats, but their mother often doesn't prefer this hobby for their children because it's very bad for their health and growing.

✓ Yes, I often ate snacks when I was a child because I think most children like and enjoy sweet foods and sugar treats, but their mothers often don't prefer this habit for their children because it's very bad for their health and growth.

描述过去习惯时，动词应使用过去式 'ate'。'like enjoy' 应为 'like and enjoy'。'mother' 应为复数 'mothers'。'hobby' 用词不当，应为 'habit'。'growing' 应为名词 'growth'。

× Yes, I often eat snacks when I was a child because I think most children like enjoy sweet foods and sugar treats, but their mother often doesn't prefer this hobby for their children because it's very bad for their health and growing.

✓ Yes, I often ate snacks when I was a child because I think most children like and enjoy sweet foods and sugar treats, but their mothers often don't prefer this habit for their children because it's very bad for their health and growth.

代词 'mother' 应为复数 'mothers'，且 'hobby' 用词不当，应为 'habit'。

× I like it sweet snacks such as cake, candies or bakery.

✓ I like sweet snacks such as cake, candies, or bakery products.

'it' 用法错误，应去掉。'bakery' 应具体指 'bakery products'。

× The chocolate flavored food is my favorite and I often eat a cake for my breakfast.

✓ Chocolate-flavored food is my favorite, and I often eat cake for my breakfast.

'The chocolate flavored food' 应为 'Chocolate-flavored food'，且 'a cake' 改为不可数名词 'cake' 更合适。

× It makes me feel not hungry during the period from breakfast to lunch and that habit make me have a bad condition in my overall.

✓ It makes me feel not hungry during the period from breakfast to lunch, and that habit makes me have a bad condition overall.

主谓一致错误，'habit' 是单数，谓语应为 'makes'。'in my overall' 结构不正确，应为 'overall'。