Snacks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 回答不够连贯，表达不自然，且有语法错误。建议回答时先直接回答问题，然后用连词连接具体细节，避免重复和语法错误。

例: I usually eat snacks in the afternoon when I feel tired. For example, on weekdays, I often find my brain is not working well, so I grab some nuts or chocolate to recharge my energy.

提案: 回答内容不够具体，句子结构不完整，缺少连贯的连接词。建议用完整句子表达观点，并用连接词使内容连贯。

例: I know eating too many snacks is unhealthy, but to some extent, it helps me relax and relieve stress. Therefore, I think eating snacks can be useful for clearing my mind.

提案: 回答中有语法错误和表达不清，且细节描述不够具体。建议使用正确的时态和句子结构，清晰描述经历。

例: Yes, when I was a child, I loved eating various snacks. For example, after finishing my homework, I often hung out with my friends and we bought chocolate cakes and cookies to share. Those were my best memories from primary school.

提案: 回答中有语法错误和表达不自然，建议使用正确的语法和连词，使表达更流畅自然。

例: I am a big fan of sweet snacks, so I usually prefer chocolate over spicy snacks like spicy strips. I also really enjoy colorful candies because they look amazing. They help me feel relaxed after a long day and give me a lot of energy.

× I always see it next when I feel tired for example.

✓ I always eat it next when I feel tired, for example.

这里使用了动词 see，但根据上下文，学生想表达的是“吃零食”，应该用动词 eat。动词时态应与现在时保持一致。

× In my week days.

✓ On my weekdays.

表示“在工作日”时，应该用介词 on 而不是 in。

× I often feel my brain is not work in the afternoon so this time I will grab some nuts or chocolate to recharge my batteries.

✓ I often feel my brain is not working in the afternoon, so at this time I will grab some nuts or chocolate to recharge my batteries.

动词 work 应该用现在分词 working 来表示正在进行的状态。

× I know it's unhealthy to eat much snacks but some extend it can relax myself.

✓ I know it's unhealthy to eat many snacks, but to some extent it can relax me.

可数名词 snacks 前应使用 many 而非 much；短语 some extend 应为 some extent；反身代词 myself 用错，应改为 me。

× And relieve my stress.

✓ And relieve my stress.

该句为不完整句，应与前句合并或补充主语和谓语。

× So is useful to clean my mind.

✓ So it is useful to clear my mind.

缺少主语 it，且动词用 clear 更合适，句子结构不完整。

× For example, out finishing my homework, I off and hang out with my friends and we went to a shop to buy chocolate cakes and cookies to shear together.

✓ For example, after finishing my homework, I often hang out with my friends and we went to a shop to buy chocolate cakes and cookies to share together.

短语 out finishing 应为 after finishing；动词 hang out 前缺少副词 often；动词 shear 拼写错误，应为 share。

× He was the best memory in my primary school.

✓ It was the best memory in my primary school.

指代“记忆”应使用 it 而非 he。

× Well I'm a bigger fan that was sweet snacks so I usually prefer chocolate over spicy snacks like spicy strips.

✓ Well, I'm a big fan of sweet snacks, so I usually prefer chocolate over spicy snacks like spicy strips.

bigger fan 用法错误，应为 big fan；that was 应改为 of。

× And I extremely enjoying colorful candies because they look amazing.

✓ And I extremely enjoy colorful candies because they look amazing.

动词 enjoy 不应加 -ing 形式，应该用原形 enjoy。

× It helps me feel relaxed after long day.

✓ It helps me feel relaxed after a long day.

缺少冠词 a，导致句子结构不完整。