Snacks— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Try to make your answer more coherent and grammatically correct. Avoid incomplete sentences and clarify unclear phrases like "At her workplace." Also, use linking words to connect ideas smoothly and keep your answer within 5 sentences.

例: I usually eat snacks in the morning and evening, often during my tea or coffee breaks. At my workplace, I try to have small snacks between tasks because they help me stay focused and productive throughout the day.

提案: Focus on clear and correct sentence structure. Avoid unclear phrases like "the IT" and "with Tom is such as old miss chia seeds." Use specific examples and linking words to explain your opinion clearly.

例: I don't think eating snacks is always healthy, but I try to choose healthy options. For example, I check the ingredients before buying and prefer snacks rich in protein, such as almonds and chia seeds.

提案: Improve grammar and clarity by avoiding repetition and incomplete sentences. Provide specific details and use linking words to make your answer more coherent and natural.

例: Yes, I often ate snacks when I was young because my parents usually had snacks with their evening tea. Also, it was a tradition in my family to serve snacks to relatives whenever they visited our home.

提案: Make your answer more fluent by using complete sentences and linking words. Avoid repetition and clarify unclear phrases like "chiya boots." Provide specific examples to support your preferences.

例: I prefer healthy snacks such as cookies, granola bars, chia seed pudding, fruits, yogurt, and nuts like walnuts and almonds because they fit well into my healthy diet.

× I usually have snacks in morning and evening time along with my tea or coffee hour.

✓ I usually have snacks in the morning and evening along with my tea or coffee.

The phrase 'in morning' is missing the definite article 'the' which is required before 'morning' and 'evening' when referring to specific times of day. Also, 'time' after 'evening' is unnecessary and 'hour' after 'coffee' is incorrect in this context.

× At her workplace.

✓ I have snacks at my workplace.

The sentence 'At her workplace.' is a fragment and lacks a subject and verb. It should be combined with the previous or next sentence to form a complete sentence.

× I try to have small snacks in between the brakes which helps me to stay on track in my work.

✓ I try to have small snacks in between the breaks which help me to stay on track with my work.

The word 'brakes' is incorrect; it should be 'breaks' meaning pauses. Also, 'helps' should be 'help' to agree with plural 'snacks'. The preposition 'on' should be 'with' in 'stay on track with my work'.

× Oh no, I don't think the IT is healthy for me to eat snacks but I mostly eat healthy snacks so I always check ingredients before purchase.

✓ Oh no, I don't think it is healthy for me to eat snacks, but I mostly eat healthy snacks, so I always check the ingredients before purchasing.

The pronoun 'the IT' is incorrect; it should be 'it'. Also, 'before purchase' should be 'before purchasing' or 'before I purchase'. Commas are added for clarity.

× Not only this I I include SNAP which are rich in protein and with Tom is such as old miss chia seeds.

✓ Not only this, I include snacks which are rich in protein and vitamins such as almonds and chia seeds.

The sentence contains multiple errors: 'I I' is a repetition; 'SNAP' is unclear and likely a typo for 'snacks'; 'with Tom is such as old miss' is nonsensical and likely meant to be 'vitamins such as almonds'. The sentence is corrected for clarity and meaning.

× Yes, I often eat snack when I was young because my parents have the habit of a used to have a habit of Offa consuming snacks along with their evening key.

✓ Yes, I often ate snacks when I was young because my parents used to have a habit of consuming snacks along with their evening tea.

The verb 'eat' should be in past tense 'ate' to match 'when I was young'. 'Have the habit of a used to have a habit of Offa' is redundant and incorrect; 'used to have a habit of' is sufficient. 'Evening key' is a typo for 'evening tea'.

× Apart from this, there is a custom of serving snacks to the relatives whenever they arrive home.

✓ Apart from this, there is a custom of serving snacks to relatives whenever they arrive home.

The definite article 'the' before 'relatives' is unnecessary when speaking generally about relatives.

× Uh, also my mother, you.

✓ Also, my mother does the same.

The original sentence is incomplete and unclear. It is corrected to a complete sentence that fits the context.

× Uh, I prefer to eat Or cookies. Granola bar, chiya boots, chia chia seed pudding. Fruit, yogurt, nuts such as walnuts, almonds.

✓ I prefer to eat cookies, granola bars, chia boots, chia seed pudding, fruit, yogurt, and nuts such as walnuts and almonds.

The nouns should be in plural form where appropriate to match the context of listing multiple items. Also, the sentence fragments are combined into a complete sentence.