Writing— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more direct and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence (e.g., "No, I don't write a lot") and avoid filler words. Add one or two specific reasons or a brief example using linking words (e.g., "because" or "however"). Keep answer under 4–5 sentences.

例: No, I don't write a lot because I finished my studies and rarely need to write for work. However, when I feel like it, I sometimes practice calligraphy by writing my name and my husband's name in a notebook.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence and specific examples. Replace vague phrases with precise language (e.g., "grocery lists" instead of "small notes for grocery"). Use a linking word to explain reason (e.g., "because"). Reduce hesitations and correct small grammar issues.

例: I mainly write short personal things, such as my name and my husband's full name, and practical items like grocery lists. I do this because I enjoy neat handwriting and I need lists to remember things when shopping.

提案: Answer directly and explain how they change with clear reasons. Use linking words (e.g., "for example", "because") and give a concise, specific example such as changing a grocery list or appointment notes. Avoid repetition.

例: Yes, what I write often changes depending on my needs. For example, I update grocery lists as my meal plans change, and I write appointment reminders when my schedule is different so I don't forget them.

提案: Give a clear preference and explain when you use each method with linking words (e.g., "so", "but", "because"). Be concise and correct grammar (use present tense). Provide one short specific example of each method.

例: I like both typing and handwriting, but I usually prefer typing for quick messages on WhatsApp because it's fast. For shopping or reminders I write sticky notes by hand because they're easy to stick on the fridge.

提案: Start with a direct answer (e.g., "I don't keep a diary"). Explain briefly why and give one specific detail about what you do write. Avoid unnecessary hesitations and keep it to two or three sentences.

例: I don't keep a diary. I do have small notebooks that look like diaries, but I only note basic information such as my job title, workplace and my name rather than personal entries.

提案: Answer directly and give a clear example of the method you use. Use linking words (e.g., "for example", "because") and correct grammar (e.g., "I just take pictures"). Be specific about when you take photos and avoid filler sounds.

例: I don't usually record my daily life, but I do take photos with my husband to preserve special memories, for example on trips or family gatherings. I rarely write journals or make videos.

× No, usually I'm not doing, uh, writing because I've done my studies and uh, so it's no need to write more.

✓ No, I don't usually write because I have finished my studies, so there is no need to write more.

The original mixes continuous and perfect tenses incorrectly and omits necessary subjects and articles. Use simple present for habitual actions ('I don't usually write'), present perfect for completed actions affecting now ('I have finished my studies'), and add 'there is' before 'no need' for grammatical completeness.

× But uh, sometime when I have a mood to write anything, I just write my name and my husband's name because I love to write sometime.

✓ But sometimes when I feel like writing, I just write my name and my husband's name because I like to write occasionally.

Use 'sometimes' (plural adverb) not 'sometime' and 'feel like' or 'am in the mood' instead of 'have a mood'. Use 'like' rather than 'love' if habitual mild preference; 'occasionally' is clearer than second 'sometime'.

× I usually prefer to write uh, me, my name and my husband's name with my family names and sometimes just grow for a small notes for grocery.

✓ I usually prefer to write my name and my husband's name with our family names, and sometimes write short notes for groceries.

Remove incorrect pronoun 'me' and fix noun phrases: 'write my name', 'family names' should be 'our family names' if shared. 'Grow for a small notes' is incorrect; use 'write short notes for groceries'. Use plural 'groceries' or 'the grocery list'.

× Otherwise, uh, there is nothing to write.

✓ Otherwise, there is nothing to write.

This sentence is acceptable grammatically; provided here for completeness. 'There is nothing to write' is correct use of 'there is'.

× Yes, sometime it's changing when you are writing anything, like if you write uh, notes for grocery, umm, so you, uh, you don't forget anything and uh, if you have any appointment and you can't forget for that appointment.

✓ Yes, sometimes it changes while you are writing something; for example, if you write notes for groceries, you won't forget anything, and if you have an appointment, you won't forget it.

Use 'sometimes' not 'sometime'. 'It changes' (simple present) or 'changes while you are writing' is clearer. Use 'something' rather than 'anything' in affirmative contexts. Use 'notes for groceries' and future/modal 'won't forget' (contraction of 'will not') to express consequence; 'can't forget for that appointment' is unidiomatic—use 'won't forget it'.

× I loved uh both like typing and handwriting.

✓ I like both typing and handwriting.

Use simple present 'like' for current preferences; 'loved' is past tense and inconsistent with present preference. Also remove filler 'uh' and redundant 'like'.

× So sometimes for grocery I just write a message to my husband, like uh, for typing, umm.

✓ So sometimes for groceries I just send a message to my husband, usually by typing.

Use 'groceries' (plural) or 'for grocery shopping' and 'send a message' is idiomatic rather than 'write a message' when using typing. 'By typing' clarifies method.

× So I prefer typing on WhatsApp and sometime I just make a a sticky note with writing.

✓ So I prefer typing on WhatsApp and sometimes I make a sticky note by hand.

Use 'sometimes' and 'make a sticky note by hand' or 'write a sticky note' for clarity. Remove duplicate 'a a'.

× So it's depend on situation, what I have mood.

✓ So it depends on the situation and how I feel.

Use third-person singular 'depends' for 'it', include article 'the situation', and idiomatic 'how I feel' instead of 'what I have mood'.

× How? To be honest, I never do keep Diaries but I have small notebooks look like Diaries but I don't write anything.

✓ How often? To be honest, I never keep a diary, but I have small notebooks that look like diaries, though I don't write in them.

Use 'How often?' as question. 'Keep a diary' is idiomatic; 'Diaries' capitalized is incorrect. 'I never keep' not 'never do keep'. Use relative clause 'that look like diaries' and 'write in them' for correct verb + preposition.

× I just write my job title, my work place and just my name.

✓ I just write my job title, my workplace, and my name.

Use 'workplace' as one word and parallel list commas; remove redundant 'just'.

× I'm not usually that person who records everything of life, but I just clicking some pictures with my husband if I need to uh, like uh, umm, like to keep save a mem as a memory.

✓ I'm not usually the kind of person who records every detail of my life, but I do take some pictures with my husband when I want to keep a memory.

Use 'the kind of person' instead of 'that person', 'records every detail of my life' is clearer. Use 'I do take' (present simple with auxiliary for emphasis) rather than 'I just clicking'. 'Take pictures' is correct; 'keep a memory' or 'save a memory' is fine—use 'keep a memory' or better 'keep as a memory'.

× Otherwise I'm not writing anything or I'm not record my life in videos and any.

✓ Otherwise, I don't write anything or record my life in videos.

Use simple present negative 'I don't write' and 'record' (base form) with proper auxiliary omitted previously. Remove 'any' which is vague. Parallel structure needed: 'I don't write anything or record my life on video.'