Writing— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer has some repetition and grammatical errors, such as 'quite oftenly' which should be 'quite often'. Try to be more concise and avoid redundancy. Also, structure your answer with a clear topic sentence followed by supporting details using linking words for coherence.

例: I write quite often, but not excessively because I prefer to save time and energy. For example, I only write important notes instead of everything in notebooks.

提案: Your answer contains many fillers and hesitations which affect fluency. Try to speak more confidently and clearly. Use linking words like 'because' to explain reasons and provide specific examples to enrich your answer.

例: I like to write down important points because they help me remember key information. For instance, I stick these notes on my wall so I can see them often.

提案: Your answer is somewhat unclear and contains grammatical mistakes. Try to express your opinion clearly with correct sentence structure. Use linking words like 'because' to explain your reasoning and avoid redundancy.

例: I believe that what you write does not change because you write it carefully and with full attention. Therefore, the information remains the same.

提案: Your answer is clear and relevant but can be improved by adding linking words and more specific details. Also, try to avoid minor grammatical errors and make your sentences more natural.

例: I usually prefer typing on my mobile phone or laptop because it is convenient and allows easy access to my notes. In contrast, handwriting can be more time-consuming and challenging.

× I quite oftenly write, but not a lot as I don't prefer writing everything on notebooks.

✓ I quite often write, but not a lot as I don't prefer writing everything in notebooks.

The adverb 'oftenly' is incorrect; the correct form is 'often'. Also, the preposition 'on' is incorrect with 'notebooks'; it should be 'in notebooks' because we write inside notebooks.

× I usually I usually don't prefer writing so I because it fits me.

✓ I usually don't prefer writing because it doesn't suit me.

The sentence has redundancy and incorrect structure. 'I usually I usually' is repeated. Also, 'so I because it fits me' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'because it doesn't suit me' or 'because it doesn't fit me' meaning it is not suitable.

× Like it's a waste of time and energy to note down something excessively.

✓ I think it's a waste of time and energy to note down things excessively.

The sentence starts with 'Like' which is informal and incomplete. Adding 'I think' makes it a complete sentence. Also, 'something' is vague; 'things' fits better here.

× When something is very significant, like, uh, uh, some highlighted points, which are very, uh, essential for me to remember, I write all those things and stick it on my wall, uh, so that I can, I can remember everything, uh, but I don't, uh, why am I don't write, uh.

✓ When something is very significant, like some highlighted points which are essential for me to remember, I write all those things and stick them on my wall so that I can remember everything, but I don't write otherwise.

The sentence has many filler words and unclear parts. 'Stick it' should be 'stick them' because 'things' is plural. The phrase 'why am I don't write' is incorrect and unclear; it is corrected to 'I don't write otherwise' to convey the intended meaning.

× No, I don't think in such a way what you write will never change because it with full consciousness and with dedication you write the things.

✓ No, I don't think that what you write will ever change because you write things with full consciousness and dedication.

The phrase 'in such a way' is unnecessary and awkward. 'Will never change' conflicts with 'don't think'; corrected to 'will ever change' to match the negative. The sentence structure is improved for clarity.

× So it's it's not a miracle that what you have written will change.

✓ So it's not a miracle that what you have written will change.

The repetition 'it's it's' is a mistake and removed for correctness.

× So it's highly impossible.

✓ So it's highly unlikely.

The phrase 'highly impossible' is incorrect because 'impossible' is absolute; 'highly unlikely' is the correct expression to indicate low probability.

× I usually prefer writing on my mobile phone or on my laptop as it is very convenient and we can have easy access to the things which we have written, whereas in handwriting I find it more challenging to write.

✓ I usually prefer writing on my mobile phone or laptop as it is very convenient and we can have easy access to the things we have written, whereas handwriting I find more challenging.

The preposition 'on' before 'my laptop' is acceptable but can be omitted for smoother flow. 'In handwriting' is better as 'handwriting' without 'in'. Also, 'to write' at the end is redundant and removed.