Writing— Part 1 採点レポート
会話
Part 1
試験官
Do you write a lot?
受験者
To be honest, I don't write at all in my free time but I have to write in like akademik purposes like for the iOS exam and writing essay to my professor or teacher.
試験官
What do you like to write? Why?
受験者
If I do have a chance to write it, I would like to write about games that I play like Pub G Mobile. I want to write about how you could play the game and how you can win it and the goal of playing it.
試験官
Do you think the things you write would change?
受験者
Uhm, I'm not very sure about this question, but I think that. Uh, in this context, I think it will like be like would change in changing the future. I think it won't change anything because it's about games.
試験官
Do you prefer typing or handwriting when you are writing?
受験者
For me, I think I like both equally because when I'm writing my idea just like flows in and I can write everything in one time, but in typewriting I don't really like when I. Tap the wrong button on the keyboard so it makes me slow.
評価
総合
Part 1
Do you write a lot?
スコア: 60.0提案: คำตอบของคุณควรใช้ภาษาอังกฤษที่เป็นธรรมชาติมากขึ้น และหลีกเลี่ยงการใช้คำที่สะกดผิด เช่น 'akademik' ควรเป็น 'academic' นอกจากนี้ ควรตอบตรงประเด็นและใช้ประโยคที่ชัดเจนและกระชับมากขึ้น
例: I don't write much in my free time, but I often write essays for academic purposes, such as for exams or assignments given by my teachers.
What do you like to write? Why?
スコア: 70.0提案: คำตอบควรมีโครงสร้างที่ชัดเจนและใช้คำเชื่อมเพื่อให้เนื้อหาดูเป็นธรรมชาติและลื่นไหลมากขึ้น รวมถึงใช้คำศัพท์ที่เหมาะสมและหลีกเลี่ยงการใช้คำซ้ำซ้อน
例: If I have the chance, I would like to write about games I play, such as PUBG Mobile, because I enjoy explaining how to play the game, strategies to win, and the main objectives.
Do you think the things you write would change?
スコア: 50.0提案: ควรตอบคำถามอย่างมั่นใจและชัดเจน หลีกเลี่ยงการใช้คำพูดที่ไม่จำเป็น เช่น 'uhm' และ 'like' และควรจัดระเบียบประโยคให้สมบูรณ์และเข้าใจง่าย
例: I'm not sure, but I believe the content I write about games probably won't change much in the future because the game rules remain the same.
Do you prefer typing or handwriting when you are writing?
スコア: 65.0提案: ควรใช้ประโยคที่สมบูรณ์และหลีกเลี่ยงการหยุดชะงักกลางประโยค รวมถึงใช้คำเชื่อมเพื่อเชื่อมโยงความคิดให้ลื่นไหลและชัดเจน
例: I like both handwriting and typing equally. When I write by hand, my ideas flow easily, but typing can be frustrating if I press the wrong keys, which slows me down.
文法
× I don't write at all in my free time but I have to write in like akademik purposes like for the iOS exam and writing essay to my professor or teacher.
✓ I don't write at all in my free time but I have to write for academic purposes like for the iOS exam and writing essays to my professor or teacher.
The preposition 'in' is incorrectly used with 'academic purposes'. The correct preposition is 'for' to indicate the purpose of writing. Also, 'akademik' is a misspelling of 'academic'. Additionally, 'writing essay' should be pluralized to 'writing essays' to match the context.
× writing essay to my professor or teacher.
✓ writing essays to my professor or teacher.
The noun 'essay' should be plural 'essays' because it refers to multiple instances or general activity of writing essays.
× If I do have a chance to write it, I would like to write about games that I play like Pub G Mobile.
✓ If I have a chance to write, I would like to write about games that I play like PUBG Mobile.
The phrase 'do have' is unnecessary here; simple present 'have' is sufficient. Also, 'write it' is vague; better to say 'write'. 'Pub G Mobile' should be 'PUBG Mobile' as the correct game name.
× I want to write about how you could play the game and how you can win it and the goal of playing it.
✓ I want to write about how to play the game, how to win it, and the goal of playing it.
Using 'you' is less appropriate in this context; better to use the infinitive form 'how to play' and 'how to win' to generalize instructions.
× Uhm, I'm not very sure about this question, but I think that. Uh, in this context, I think it will like be like would change in changing the future.
✓ Uhm, I'm not very sure about this question, but I think that in this context, it might change in the future.
The original sentence is fragmented and contains redundant words like 'like be like would'. The corrected sentence is clearer and grammatically correct.
× I think it won't change anything because it's about games.
✓ I think it won't change anything because it's about games.
This sentence is correct and requires no change.
× For me, I think I like both equally because when I'm writing my idea just like flows in and I can write everything in one time, but in typewriting I don't really like when I. Tap the wrong button on the keyboard so it makes me slow.
✓ For me, I think I like both equally because when I'm writing, my ideas just flow in and I can write everything at one time, but when typing, I don't really like it when I tap the wrong button on the keyboard because it makes me slow.
The phrase 'in one time' should be 'at one time'. 'In typewriting' is better expressed as 'when typing'. Also, 'my idea just like flows in' should be 'my ideas just flow in' for subject-verb agreement and clarity. The sentence was fragmented and needed restructuring for clarity.
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