Names— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Try to make your answer more concise and clear by avoiding repetition and grammatical errors. Use linking words to connect ideas smoothly and keep your response within 5 sentences.

例: My name doesn't have a special meaning, but my mom named me after her best friend. She admired her because she was smart, pretty, and well-mannered. That's why she chose this name for me.

提案: Improve your answer by using clearer linking words and correcting grammar. Also, avoid repeating similar ideas and provide more specific reasons for your choices.

例: When choosing names for my future children, I would consider uniqueness and biblical significance. For instance, names like Sarah or Sephora are meaningful and uncommon, which makes them special choices.

提案: Make your answer clearer and grammatically correct. Avoid incomplete sentences and explain your points logically with linking words.

例: No, I am the only person in my family with this name. My mom wanted my name to be unique so that I could stand out.

提案: Try to answer the question directly first, then add your own cultural comparison. Use linking words to connect ideas and avoid vague phrases like 'I really don't have any idea'.

例: I am not sure about Chinese naming traditions, but in Filipino culture, we usually choose westernized names like Joshua or Joseph instead of ancestral names.

提案: Answer the question more directly and briefly, then provide your cultural example with clear linking words. Avoid repeating similar ideas and improve sentence structure.

例: I don't know about popular names in China, but in the Philippines, names like John, Joseph, and Maria are common because of our religious and cultural traditions.

× she really look up to her because she's be she's pretty, she's smart, she's she looks clean.

✓ she really looks up to her because she's pretty, she's smart, she looks clean.

The verb 'look' should be in the third person singular form 'looks' to agree with the subject 'she'. Also, 'she's be' is incorrect and should be removed for clarity.

× she's be she's pretty, she's smart, she's she looks clean.

✓ she's pretty, she's smart, she looks clean.

The phrase 'she's be' is grammatically incorrect; the past tense 'be' is not needed here and should be omitted.

× First is that I wanted to be unique.

✓ First is that I want to be unique.

The sentence is about a current or future preference, so the present tense 'want' is appropriate instead of the past tense 'wanted'.

× Second, I wanted to be a name from Bible like from verses or a person in the stories of Bible.

✓ Second, I want it to be a name from the Bible, like from verses or a person in the stories of the Bible.

The present tense 'want' fits better for expressing current or future intentions. Also, 'Bible' should be preceded by 'the' as it is a specific book.

× Second, I wanted to be a name from Bible like from verses or a person in the stories of Bible.

✓ Second, I want it to be a name from the Bible, like from verses or a person in the stories of the Bible.

The definite article 'the' is required before 'Bible' because it refers to a specific book.

× No, actually the only person that has this name in our family because when choosing a name, my mom told me that she really wanted my name to be unique for me to send out.

✓ No, actually I am the only person that has this name in our family because when choosing a name, my mom told me that she really wanted my name to be unique for me to stand out.

The sentence lacked a clear subject; 'I am the only person' clarifies singular subject. Also, 'send out' is incorrect in this context; 'stand out' is the correct phrase.

× I really don't have any idea with regards to Chinese naming their children.

✓ I really don't have any idea regarding Chinese naming their children.

The phrase 'with regards to' is incorrect; the correct preposition is 'regarding' or 'with regard to'.

× Filipinos like to name their children westernized name like Joshua, Joseph, Marco and more.

✓ Filipinos like to name their children westernized names like Joshua, Joseph, Marco and more.

The plural 'names' is needed because multiple examples are given.

× a lot of people are named John Joseph Maria.

✓ a lot of people are named John, Joseph, or Maria.

The names should be separated by commas and 'or' to indicate alternatives; also, the original sentence lacks clarity.

× Maybe this is due to our background and traditions because Filipinos are really religious people and conservative people that is why their names are mostly from religious.

✓ Maybe this is due to our background and traditions because Filipinos are really religious and conservative people; that is why their names are mostly from religion.

The phrase 'from religious' is incorrect; it should be 'from religion'. Also, the sentence is improved by adding a semicolon and removing redundancy.