Hometown— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 답변이 자연스럽고 효과적이지만, 문법 오류와 어색한 표현이 있습니다. 예를 들어, 'Choladando'는 'Jeollado'로 수정하고, 'no Subway and no Starbucks' 대신 'there are no Subway or Starbucks'로 표현하는 것이 좋습니다. 또한, 문장 연결을 위해 접속사를 사용하면 더 자연스럽습니다.

例: My hometown is Hwasun, a small city in Jeollado. Although there are no Subway or Starbucks outlets, it is a very quiet and peaceful place, which I really like.

提案: 답변이 명확하지 않고 문법과 어휘 사용에 오류가 많습니다. 'zolado'는 아마 'Jeollado'를 의미하는 것 같으나 정확하지 않고, 문장 구조가 혼란스럽습니다. 구체적인 이유와 예시를 명확하게 제시하고, 문장 연결어를 사용해 답변을 개선하세요.

例: I like my hometown because it is famous for its delicious food, which many Koreans appreciate. Also, my family lives there, and I enjoy spending time with them.

提案: 답변에 사실과 문법 오류가 있습니다. 'lived there for 90 years'는 부적절하며, 'came up for a soul'은 'moved to Seoul'로 수정해야 합니다. 정확한 기간과 이유를 명확하게 표현하고, 문장 구조를 개선하세요.

例: I was born in that city and lived there until I was 20 years old. Then, I moved to Seoul to attend university.

提案: 답변이 다소 혼란스럽고 중복된 단어('souvenir souvenirs')가 있습니다. '20 ages' 대신 'people in their twenties'로 표현하고, 문장 연결어를 사용해 논리적으로 답변을 구성하세요. 또한, 구체적인 이유를 명확히 제시하는 것이 좋습니다.

例: Yes, I think my hometown is a good place for young people in their twenties because it is quiet, which helps them focus on their studies. Also, the cost of living is low, making it easier for adults to buy a home.

× there are no Subway and no Starbucks

✓ there are no Subways and no Starbucks

'Subway' is a countable noun and should be pluralized as 'Subways' when referring to multiple outlets. 'Starbucks' is a proper noun and remains singular or plural as is.

× It's really quiet place and really peaceful

✓ It's a really quiet place and really peaceful

The noun 'place' requires an article. Since it is singular and countable, 'a' should be used before 'really quiet place'.

× every Korean people called zolado is so I really proud of them

✓ every Korean person called zolado is so I am really proud of them

'People' is plural, but 'every' requires a singular noun, so 'person' is correct here. Also, the sentence structure is unclear and needs correction for clarity.

× my family are leaves in my hometown is really good

✓ my family who lives in my hometown is really good

'Family' is a collective noun treated as singular, so 'is' is correct. 'Leaves' is incorrect; likely intended 'lives'. Also, a relative pronoun 'who' is needed to connect the clause.

× I lived there for 90 years

✓ I have lived there for 20 years

The original '90 years' is likely a mistake given the context. Also, 'have lived' is more appropriate to express duration up to the present.

× when I was a 20 I came up for a soul because my university is in Seoul

✓ when I was 20 I came up to Seoul because my university is in Seoul

No article is needed before age numbers. 'Came up for a soul' is incorrect; it should be 'came up to Seoul'. 'Soul' is a misspelling of 'Seoul'.

× it's really good place for young people like 20 ages and some souvenir souvenirs

✓ it's a really good place for young people around 20 years old and some souvenirs

'Place' needs an article 'a'. '20 ages' is incorrect; '20 years old' or 'around 20' is correct. 'Souvenir souvenirs' is redundant; just 'souvenirs' is correct.

× they can focus their study well

✓ they can focus on their studies well

'Focus' requires the preposition 'on'. 'Study' should be plural 'studies' when referring to academic work in general.

× honestly the living cost is really cheap so adults can buy home

✓ honestly the living cost is really cheap so adults can buy homes

'Buy home' is incorrect; it should be 'buy homes' or 'buy a home' depending on context. Plural 'homes' fits better here.