Hometown— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Try to avoid filler words like 'uh' and 'um' to make your answer sound more natural and fluent. Also, use linking words to connect your ideas smoothly. For example, you can say: "My hometown is located north of Rome, which is the capital of Italy. It is a small area rich in green spaces such as parks and lakes, making it very beautiful."

例: My hometown is located north of Rome, which is the capital of Italy. It is a small area rich in green spaces such as parks and lakes, making it very beautiful.

提案: Avoid hesitation and incomplete sentences. Use clear and complete sentences with linking words to explain your ideas. For example, you can say: "I like my hometown because it is very beautiful and unique. It is characterized by two large lakes, Martignano and Brazzano, which add to its charm."

例: I like my hometown because it is very beautiful and unique. It is characterized by two large lakes, Martignano and Brazzano, which add to its charm.

提案: Use correct tense and clearer expressions to indicate duration. For example, say: "I have lived here since I was two years old, so it has been about 22 years."

例: I have lived here since I was two years old, so it has been about 22 years.

提案: Avoid filler words and improve sentence structure. Use linking words to connect ideas. For example: "Yes, I think my hometown is a good place for young people to grow up because there are many schools and parks where children can play and have fun."

例: Yes, I think my hometown is a good place for young people to grow up because there are many schools and parks where children can play and have fun.

× My hometown is located in the north of Rome, Uh, that is the capital of Italy, my country and is a small area, uh, which is very rich in green areas like park, uh, or lakes and it's, uh, beautiful.

✓ My hometown is located in the north of Rome, which is the capital of Italy, my country, and it is a small area that is very rich in green areas like parks or lakes and it's beautiful.

The phrase 'north of Rome' is correct, but 'like park' should be pluralized to 'like parks' to match the plural noun form. Also, 'and is a small area' should be 'and it is a small area' to include the subject 'it' for clarity and correct sentence structure. The use of commas and conjunctions is adjusted for better flow and correctness.

× My hometown is, uh, particular and it's very beautiful because it is characterized by, uh, the presence of, uh, two big lakes such as Umm Martignano and Brazzano's one and the, the present.

✓ My hometown is particular and very beautiful because it is characterized by the presence of two big lakes such as Umm Martignano and Brazzano.

The phrase 'Brazzano's one and the, the present' is unclear and incorrect. The possessive 'Brazzano's one' is unnecessary and confusing. Removing it and ending the sentence after 'Brazzano' clarifies the meaning. Also, 'the present' is incomplete and likely a mistake.

× I live here from since I was 2 years old and now it's maybe 22 year span that I live here.

✓ I have lived here since I was 2 years old, and now it's been maybe 22 years that I have lived here.

The phrase 'from since' is redundant; only 'since' is needed to indicate the starting point of time. Also, '22 year span' should be '22 years' to correctly express duration. The present perfect tense 'have lived' is appropriate to describe an action continuing from the past to the present.

× Yeah, I think it's a good place to young people and for growing for grow child here because of the lots of school lots, there's lots of park to uh, bring child and umm, and having fun there.

✓ Yeah, I think it's a good place for young people and for raising children here because there are lots of schools and parks to bring children to and have fun there.

The phrase 'a good place to young people' should be 'a good place for young people' to use the correct preposition. 'For growing for grow child' is incorrect; 'for raising children' is the proper expression. 'Lots of school lots' is confusing; it should be 'lots of schools'. Also, 'lots of park' should be 'lots of parks'. The sentence is restructured for clarity and grammatical correctness.