Hometown— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is generally clear but can be improved by avoiding repetition and making the explanation more concise and natural. For example, instead of repeating "beautiful" twice, you can use synonyms or combine ideas. Also, the last sentence about the river can be clearer and more grammatically correct.

例: I come from Shorepur, a small but picturesque district in the Dhaka division of Bangladesh. It used to have a river flowing nearby, but unfortunately, it has disappeared due to illegal activities by some businessmen.

提案: Your answer lists points but lacks smooth linking and some redundancy (e.g., "very very famous"). Try to use linking words to connect your ideas and avoid repeating words. Also, be more specific about the traditional food to make your answer richer.

例: I like many things about my hometown. Firstly, the atmosphere is fresh and clean. Moreover, its natural beauty is well-known throughout Bangladesh. Finally, the traditional food, such as pitha and hilsa fish dishes, is famous worldwide.

提案: Your answer contains some grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. For example, "that called Shoryutpur" should be "called Shoryutpur" or "which is called Shoryutpur." Also, use past tense consistently and avoid unnecessary fillers like "Well, to be honest."

例: I was born and raised in my village called Shoryutpur, where I lived for about 15 years. I started my primary school there before moving to Dhaka.

提案: Your answer has grammatical mistakes and incomplete ideas. For example, "some famous school and colleges" should be "some famous schools and colleges." Also, the last sentence "So I think it's enough for young" is incomplete. Try to complete your thoughts and use plural forms correctly.

例: Yes, I believe my hometown is a good place for young people because it has several well-known schools and colleges. In addition, there are good hospitals and shopping centers, which make it convenient for young residents.

× A river was flowing by my district but right now the river is not present because of some illegal businessmen.

✓ A river flowed by my district but right now the river is not present because of some illegal businessmen.

The sentence uses 'was flowing' which is past continuous, but the context suggests a completed action in the past. Using the simple past 'flowed' is more appropriate here to indicate the river existed before but does not now.

× I spent almost 15 year in my hometown and I started my primary school there and later I shifted to Dhaka.

✓ I spent almost 15 years in my hometown and I started my primary school there and later I shifted to Dhaka.

The word 'year' should be plural 'years' because it refers to more than one year (15). This is a common singular/plural agreement issue.

× Yes, I believe my hometown is a good place for young people because there are some famous school and colleges in my hometown.

✓ Yes, I believe my hometown is a good place for young people because there are some famous schools and colleges in my hometown.

The word 'school' should be plural 'schools' to agree with 'colleges' and the plural quantifier 'some'. This is a singular/plural agreement issue.

× Not only that they are are well known hospital and shopping centre.

✓ Not only that, there are well-known hospitals and shopping centres.

'Hospital' and 'shopping centre' should be plural to match the plural verb 'are' and the context. Also, 'are are' is a repetition error corrected to 'there are'. This is a singular/plural agreement issue and sentence structure correction.

× So I think it's enough for young.

✓ So I think it's enough for young people.

The sentence is incomplete and unclear. Adding 'people' after 'young' completes the meaning. This is a sentence structure error.