Hometown— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer has some unclear words and grammar mistakes. Try to use clear and correct English, and avoid redundancy. For example, say "My hometown is in the western part of Bangladesh, near the capital city Dhaka. It has good transportation and beautiful natural scenery."

例: My hometown is in the western part of Bangladesh, near the capital city Dhaka. It has good transportation and beautiful natural scenery.

提案: Your answer is good but can be clearer and more natural. Use linking words like "firstly" and "also" to organize your ideas. For example, "Firstly, I love the natural scenery because it gives me peace and happiness. Also, I appreciate the strong sense of community."

例: Firstly, I love the natural scenery because it gives me peace and happiness. Also, I appreciate the strong sense of community.

提案: Your answer is too long and unclear at the end. Try to be concise and clear. For example, "I have lived there all my life with my family and friends. I want to stay there because I feel a strong connection and comfort that I cannot find anywhere else."

例: I have lived there all my life with my family and friends. I want to stay there because I feel a strong connection and comfort that I cannot find anywhere else.

提案: Your answer has many grammar and clarity issues. Try to speak clearly and organize your ideas. For example, "Yes, my hometown is good for young people because it has playgrounds, schools, museums, and good facilities for education and entertainment."

例: Yes, my hometown is good for young people because it has playgrounds, schools, museums, and good facilities for education and entertainment.

× My hometown is cooler, it is a S organs western city of Bangladesh and in terms of transportation and other facilities it is very close to the capital city of Dhaka.

✓ My hometown is Cox's Bazar, a southern western city of Bangladesh, and in terms of transportation and other facilities, it is very close to the capital city of Dhaka.

The original sentence contains a nonsensical phrase 'S organs western city' which seems to be a typographical error. Correcting it to 'a southern western city' clarifies the meaning and fixes the singular/plural and noun usage issue.

× And it is a nice city surrounding by nice natural sceneries.

✓ And it is a nice city surrounded by beautiful natural scenery.

The phrase 'surrounding by' is incorrect; the correct passive form is 'surrounded by'. Also, 'natural sceneries' is incorrect because 'scenery' is an uncountable noun, so 'beautiful natural scenery' is appropriate.

× There are numerous things that I like about my hometown, but the most favorite thing of mine is the natural scenery where I get a peace and happiness and the other thing is the sense of community of my own.

✓ There are numerous things that I like about my hometown, but my favorite thing is the natural scenery where I find peace and happiness, and the other is the sense of community of my own.

The phrase 'the most favorite thing of mine' is redundant; 'my favorite thing' is correct. Also, 'get a peace and happiness' is incorrect; 'find peace and happiness' is the proper expression.

× Actually, I have been living here since the very beginning of my life together with my family, friends and neighbors, and I think I want to live there throughout my life because nowhere in the world I can find face like what I can get from.

✓ Actually, I have been living here since the very beginning of my life together with my family, friends, and neighbors, and I think I want to live there throughout my life because nowhere in the world can I find a place like what I get from here.

The sentence has word order issues and missing words. 'Nowhere in the world I can find face like what I can get from' is incorrect. The correct form is 'nowhere in the world can I find a place like what I get from here.' Also, 'face' should be 'place'.

× Yes, my hometown is very good flesh for young people because there are here we we can find some things that are favorite to the young generation like the playgrounds that schools and museums and definitely the facilities to go to the bigger.

✓ Yes, my hometown is very good for young people because here we can find some things that are favorite to the young generation like playgrounds, schools, museums, and definitely facilities to go to bigger cities.

The phrase 'very good flesh' is incorrect; it should be 'very good for'. Also, 'the playgrounds that schools' is incorrect; it should be 'playgrounds, schools'. The sentence is corrected for clarity and proper plural usage.