Hometown— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is unclear and does not directly respond to the question. You should clearly state the name of your hometown and avoid unrelated information. Keep your answer natural and concise.

例: My hometown is Lahore, Pakistan. I have been living there with my family for many years.

提案: Your answer has good points but is too long and somewhat unclear. Use linking words to connect ideas and avoid redundancy. Also, correct grammar and sentence structure will make your answer more natural and effective.

例: I like my hometown because the neighbors are very friendly and helpful. Moreover, there are many parks where people can enjoy recreational activities in their spare time.

提案: Your answer is somewhat confusing and contains grammatical errors. Provide a clear and direct response with correct tense and structure.

例: I have lived in my current hometown for about two years because my family moved here recently.

提案: Your answer is unclear and contains many grammatical mistakes. Try to express your opinion clearly with supporting reasons using correct vocabulary and sentence structure.

例: I don't think my hometown is a good place for young people because there are limited job opportunities and facilities. Therefore, many young people prefer to move to bigger cities for better career prospects.

× Where is your hometown of Pakistan? And be with my family members about two years.

✓ My hometown is in Pakistan. I have been living with my family members for about two years.

The original sentence is fragmented and lacks proper sentence structure. 'Where is your hometown of Pakistan?' is incorrect because it confuses the question and answer. Also, 'And be with my family members about two years' is incomplete and lacks a verb tense. The correction provides a clear statement and uses the present perfect continuous tense to indicate duration.

× Most important thing that I like about my hometown is that the neighbors here are very welcoming and people are very friendly and they are very polite and calm and help other needy people in whenever they need helps.

✓ The most important thing that I like about my hometown is that the neighbors here are very welcoming, people are very friendly, polite, calm, and they help other needy people whenever they need help.

The phrase 'help other needy people in whenever they need helps' is incorrect. The preposition 'in' is unnecessary, and 'helps' should be 'help' as a noun. The correction removes the unnecessary preposition and corrects the noun form.

× And also of course they had a lot of parks available. Therefore recreational activities Ann Arbor lies below. I would like to go there and the spare times.

✓ Also, of course, there are a lot of parks available. Therefore, recreational activities are abundant. I would like to go there in my spare time.

The original sentences are fragmented and unclear. 'Ann Arbor lies below' is unrelated and confusing. 'I would like to go there and the spare times' is grammatically incorrect. The correction clarifies the meaning and corrects sentence structure and word choice.

× Here for about two years, 'cause we simply have been shifting toward to the new town. That's why I've been living there for about two years ago.

✓ I have been living here for about two years because we have been moving to a new town. That's why I have been living here for about two years.

The original sentence is fragmented and uses incorrect tense and prepositions. 'Shifting toward to' is incorrect; 'moving to' is correct. 'I've been living there for about two years ago' mixes present perfect with a past time expression 'ago', which is incorrect. The correction uses present perfect tense appropriately and corrects prepositions.

× No, I don't think so each other place for young people because there are not many opportunities available for job K. Here's another facilities that will help pay for the information. That's why I think they would be preferable to do go to another sub cities they find maximum Portuguese in regarding to their future careers.

✓ No, I don't think it is a good place for young people because there are not many job opportunities available here. There are other facilities that can help with information. That's why I think they would prefer to go to other suburbs where they can find better prospects for their future careers.

The original sentence misuses pronouns like 'each other' and 'they' ambiguously. 'Job K' is unclear and likely a mistake for 'job opportunities'. 'Preferable to do go' is incorrect verb usage. The correction clarifies pronoun references, corrects vocabulary, and improves sentence structure.