Hometown— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: 回答中存在语法错误和表达不自然的问题，句子结构不完整，且信息表达不够清晰。建议使用完整句子，明确地点描述，并避免拼写错误。

例: My hometown is a small city located in the southwest of China, surrounded by mountains. The Agan River flows through the downtown area. I always remember the fresh air every morning, which makes it a very pleasant place to live.

提案: 回答内容不完整且表达混乱，缺少具体细节和连贯性。建议完整描述喜欢的食物，使用连词连接句子，并提供具体例子。

例: I really like the food in my hometown because it is unique and delicious. For example, there is a special breakfast dish that looks like noodles but is made from rice flour. This dish is very popular and holds a special place in my heart.

提案: 回答中有语法错误和表达不清晰的问题，句子不连贯。建议使用完整句子，清晰表达时间和原因，并注意拼写和语法。

例: I lived in my hometown for 22 years before moving to Beijing to start my college life. Since then, I have been living and working in Beijing. However, I plan to return to my hometown when I get older because I prefer the food and the peaceful environment there.

提案: 回答表达不清且语法错误较多，缺乏连贯性。建议明确表达观点，使用正确的语法和连接词，具体说明原因。

例: I don't think my hometown is a good place for young people because life there is too relaxed. Young people usually need a passionate and competitive environment, which my hometown lacks. It is more suitable for older people, which is why I plan to return there when I get older.

× My birth place is a small city that places in the southwest of China and surrounding mountains.

✓ My birthplace is a small city that is located in the southwest of China and is surrounded by mountains.

“birth place”应写为一个词“birthplace”；“places”用法错误，应使用被动语态“is located”；“surrounding mountains”应改为“is surrounded by mountains”以表达被动含义。

× Agree River across the downtown.

✓ The Agre River flows across the downtown.

句子缺少主语和谓语，且“Agree River”应为“Agre River”，需要完整句子结构。

× I always remember the fresh air every morning.

✓ I always remember the fresh air in the morning.

“every morning”用法不自然，通常用“in the morning”表达每天早晨的空气。

× No, another food can replay it in my heart.

✓ No other food can replace it in my heart.

“another food”用法错误，应为“other food”；“replay”应为“replace”，意思是替代。

× Especially myth and special and unique breakfast dish that looks like noodles but it made from.

✓ Especially the special and unique breakfast dish that looks like noodles but is made from something else.

句子结构不完整，缺少谓语“is made”；“myth”用法错误，应去掉或改为“mythical”且需明确含义。

× I lived in my hometown for 22 years before moving to Beijing to start my.

✓ I lived in my hometown for 22 years before moving to Beijing to start my college life.

句子不完整，缺少“college life”部分。

× Since then I have been living and working in Beijing but I'll go back to my home town when I get older becauses I think the food under the claim made their suit me better.

✓ Since then, I have been living and working in Beijing, but I'll go back to my hometown when I get older because I think the food there suits me better.

“becauses”拼写错误，应为“because”；“under the claim made their”语义不清，应改为“there suits me better”。

× I think it's not be better for young people.

✓ I think it's not better for young people.

“not be better”结构错误，应去掉“be”。

× My hometown life is too much relax and acquired young man need the passion and compete life not confortable.

✓ Life in my hometown is too relaxed, and young people need a passionate and competitive life, not a comfortable one.

“too much relax”应为“too relaxed”；“acquired young man”表达错误，应为“young people”；“compete life”应为“competitive life”；“not confortable”拼写错误，应为“not comfortable”。

× My hometown is go better for old people leave.

✓ My hometown is better for old people to live in.

“is go better”错误，应为“is better”；“leave”应为“live”。

× That is the reason why am I go back when I get older.

✓ That is the reason why I will go back when I get older.

句子语序错误，应为“why I will go back”。