Work— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer should be more natural and grammatically correct. Start with a clear topic sentence and add supporting details using proper sentence structure. Avoid redundancy and incomplete sentences.

例: I am currently working as a registered nurse at Indus Hospital. I have five years of experience in healthcare nursing, which I find very fulfilling.

提案: Avoid repeating the examiner's question. Use linking words to connect your ideas and complete your sentences. Be specific and clear about your role and the hospital.

例: I work at Indus Hospital and Health Network, where I have been employed for five years. My role involves delivering high-quality healthcare services to patients and supporting their recovery, which I find very rewarding because it allows me to make a positive impact on people's lives. The hospital is well equipped with modern facilities.

提案: Your answer is clear but can be improved by using more varied vocabulary and linking words to make it more coherent and natural.

例: Yes, it is a very good place to work because the environment is friendly and supportive. Moreover, the hospital is well equipped and has a dedicated team, which makes working there enjoyable.

提案: Your answer lacks clarity and contains grammatical errors. Use clear sentences and explain why you like your job with specific reasons. Avoid incomplete or confusing phrases.

例: Yes, I love my work because it gives me a sense of satisfaction and peace of mind. Additionally, my job provides me with professional certification, which motivates me to perform better.

提案: Your answer is unclear and grammatically incorrect. Use a clear topic sentence and explain your future plans with proper grammar and linking words.

例: In the future, I plan to work abroad to gain more knowledge and experience in my field. This will help me improve my skills and contribute better to my profession.

× I am doing work.

✓ I am working.

The phrase 'I am doing work' is awkward and not commonly used in English. The correct present continuous form to express current employment is 'I am working.' This fits the context better and sounds natural.

× I work as a registered nurse by profession in Indus Hospital, has five years experience, has a healthcare nursing.

✓ I work as a registered nurse by profession at Indus Hospital and have five years of experience in healthcare nursing.

The original sentence incorrectly uses 'has' instead of 'have' for the first person singular subject 'I'. Also, 'experience' should be preceded by 'of' and 'healthcare nursing' needs to be clarified as a field. The corrected sentence uses proper subject-verb agreement and clearer phrasing.

× I work as a registered nurse by profession in Indus Hospital, has five years experience, has a healthcare nursing.

✓ I work as a registered nurse by profession at Indus Hospital and have five years of experience in healthcare nursing.

The preposition 'in' is less appropriate for institutions like hospitals; 'at' is preferred. Also, 'has five years experience' should be 'have five years of experience' to match the subject and correct the preposition.

× Do you work? I work at Hindus Hospital and Health Network where I have been employed for five years.

✓ I work at Indus Hospital and Health Network, where I have been employed for five years.

The question 'Do you work?' is unnecessary and confusing here. Also, the hospital name was misspelled as 'Hindus' instead of 'Indus'. The corrected sentence removes the redundant question and corrects the hospital name for clarity.

× My role involved delivering high quality healthcare service to patients and supporting their recovery, which I find very rewarding because it's allow me to make a positive impact on people lives.

✓ My role involves delivering high-quality healthcare services to patients and supporting their recovery, which I find very rewarding because it allows me to make a positive impact on people's lives.

The verb 'involved' should be in present tense 'involves' to match the ongoing role. 'It's allow' is incorrect; it should be 'it allows' for subject-verb agreement. Also, 'healthcare service' should be plural 'healthcare services' and 'people lives' should be 'people's lives' to show possession.

× The hospital is well equipped and has.

✓ The hospital is well equipped and has excellent facilities.

The original sentence is incomplete and lacks an object after 'has'. Adding 'excellent facilities' completes the sentence and provides clear meaning.

× Yes, it is a very good place and environment is also very good.

✓ Yes, it is a very good place, and the environment is also very good.

The sentence lacks the definite article 'the' before 'environment'. Adding 'the' clarifies that a specific environment is being referred to.

× It's it is getting it.

✓ It is fulfilling.

The original phrase is confusing and ungrammatical. Replacing it with 'It is fulfilling' conveys the intended meaning clearly and correctly.

× It gives me peaceful mind and certification job.

✓ It gives me peace of mind and a secure job.

'Peaceful mind' is incorrect; the correct phrase is 'peace of mind'. 'Certification job' is unclear; 'secure job' or 'stable job' is more appropriate to express job satisfaction.

× According to myself, I never I plan for working abroad to getting some more information and knowledge.

✓ Personally, I have never planned to work abroad, but I would like to gain more information and knowledge.

The original sentence has incorrect modal verb usage and awkward phrasing. 'I never I plan' is incorrect; it should be 'I have never planned'. Also, 'to getting' should be 'to gain'. The corrected sentence uses proper modal verbs and clearer structure.