Work— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is understandable but lacks the article 'a' before 'student' and could be more natural. Try to form a complete sentence with a clear topic sentence and supporting detail. For example, say 'I am a student studying music at university.'

例: I am a student studying music at the university, and I have been focusing on classical piano for the past two years.

提案: Your answer is clear but could be more natural by using 'a school near my house' instead of 'the school which is near my house'. Also, 'two times a week' is better expressed as 'twice a week'.

例: I work as a tutor at a school near my house, and I teach there twice a week.

提案: Your answer has good points but is unclear and contains grammatical errors. Avoid filler words like 'uh' and use correct prepositions. For example, say 'I think it is a good place to work because the staff are very kind to me, and it is convenient as I can get there in 10 minutes from my house.'

例: I think it is a good place to work because the staff are very kind to me, and it is convenient since I can get there in just 10 minutes from my house.

提案: Your answer is confusing and repetitive. Try to answer directly with a clear topic sentence and supporting details using linking words. For example, 'Yes, I would like to work there because it is very convenient for me. Since it is near my house, I can save time commuting.'

例: Yes, I would like to work there because it is very convenient for me. Since it is near my house, I can save time commuting and focus more on my work.

提案: Your answer is understandable but has grammatical errors and is incomplete. Avoid repeating phrases and form a complete sentence. For example, 'After graduating from university, I want to become a music teacher at a school, so I will need to take exams for this job.'

例: After graduating from university, I want to become a music teacher at a school, so I will need to take the necessary exams to qualify for this position.

× I'm student.

✓ I'm a student.

The sentence is missing the indefinite article 'a' before the singular noun 'student'. In English, singular countable nouns usually require an article. Therefore, 'I'm student' should be corrected to 'I'm a student'. This improves grammatical correctness and clarity.

× I work as a tutor in the school which is near my house.

✓ I work as a tutor at the school which is near my house.

The preposition 'in' is incorrectly used here. When referring to working at an institution or place, 'at' is the appropriate preposition. 'In the school' suggests being inside the building, while 'at the school' refers to the location or institution where one works.

× I work there two times a week.

✓ I work there twice a week.

The phrase 'two times a week' is grammatically correct but less natural in spoken English. The adverb 'twice' is preferred for expressing frequency. Therefore, 'I work there two times a week' should be corrected to 'I work there twice a week' for naturalness and correctness.

× I think they're a good place to work because, uh, the, any workers are very kind for me and the place is uh, convenient to me because, uh, I, I can get there for 10 minutes from house.

✓ I think it's a good place to work because the workers are very kind to me and the place is convenient for me because I can get there in 10 minutes from my house.

Several issues here: 'they're' incorrectly refers to 'place' which is singular, so 'it's' is correct. 'Any workers' is incorrect; 'the workers' is appropriate. The preposition 'for me' should be 'to me' when describing kindness. 'Convenient to me' should be 'convenient for me'. 'Get there for 10 minutes' should be 'get there in 10 minutes'. Also, 'from house' lacks the possessive pronoun 'my'. These corrections improve grammatical accuracy and clarity.

× I would like to choose the place where I work is a very convenient place for me.

✓ I would like to choose a place to work that is very convenient for me.

The original sentence has incorrect sentence structure and conjunction use. 'Where I work is a very convenient place' is awkward and ungrammatical. The corrected sentence uses a relative clause 'that is very convenient for me' to properly modify 'a place to work'. This correction improves sentence clarity and grammatical correctness.

× For example, as I said I worked as a tutor.

✓ For example, as I said, I work as a tutor.

The student is currently working as a tutor, so the present tense 'work' is appropriate rather than the past tense 'worked'. Using the past tense implies the action is finished, which contradicts the context. Therefore, 'worked' should be corrected to 'work'.

× Now why I choose this work is it is very convenient near my house?

✓ The reason I chose this work is that it is very convenient near my house.

The original sentence is ungrammatical and awkward. It lacks proper sentence structure and word order. The corrected sentence uses a clear subject ('The reason I chose this work'), verb ('is'), and complement ('that it is very convenient near my house'). Also, 'choose' should be past tense 'chose' to match the context.

× After graduating university, I want to be a music teacher in school, so I should I should take exams for these jobs?

✓ After graduating from university, I want to be a music teacher in a school, so should I take exams for these jobs?

The phrase 'graduating university' is missing the preposition 'from'. The repetition of 'I should' is incorrect and redundant. The sentence is a question, so the modal verb 'should' should be placed at the beginning of the question clause ('should I take exams'). Also, 'in school' should be 'in a school' to specify the workplace. These corrections improve grammatical accuracy and clarity.