Work— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Your answer is somewhat clear but contains some unclear phrases like 'by Kamasi' which may confuse the listener. Try to be more precise and natural by directly stating your current status and recent activities without unnecessary or unclear details.

例: I am currently a student. I recently finished my senior secondary studies and have started attending cooking classes because I am passionate about cooking.

提案: Your answer repeats information from the previous question and uses the word 'scholar' in an unusual way. Try to answer directly and avoid repetition by focusing on your current activities and interests clearly.

例: I don't work at the moment; instead, I am focusing on my studies and attending cooking classes since I have a strong interest in cooking.

提案: Your answer is unclear and contains grammatical errors. Use simple and clear sentences to describe the environment and your feelings about it. Avoid vague phrases like 'talk very spectacularly and kind of'.

例: Yes, the cooking classes are a great place to be. The atmosphere is relaxed and friendly, and everyone is very kind and supportive.

提案: Your answer is repetitive and unclear. Try to give a direct response and support it with clear reasons using linking words to improve coherence.

例: Yes, I like the place because it has a friendly environment and the people are very kind, which makes learning enjoyable.

提案: Your answer is confusing and contains unclear phrases like 'senior family studies' and 'take a mission in Bcom'. Use clear and correct expressions to explain your future plans.

例: I have recently completed my senior secondary studies, and now I plan to pursue a Bachelor of Commerce degree at the University of Ludhiana.

× I have recently completed my senior secondary study by Kamasi and now I am joining cooking classes.

✓ I have recently completed my senior secondary studies at Kamasi and now I am joining cooking classes.

The phrase 'senior secondary study' should be pluralised to 'senior secondary studies' to correctly refer to the course of study. Also, 'by Kamasi' is incorrect preposition usage; 'at Kamasi' is appropriate to indicate the place of study.

× I have recently completed my senior secondary study by Kamasi and now I am joining cooking classes.

✓ I have recently completed my senior secondary studies at Kamasi and now I am joining cooking classes.

The preposition 'by' is incorrectly used to indicate the place of study. The correct preposition is 'at' when referring to an institution or location where studies are completed.

× Actually, I am a scholar now.

✓ Actually, I am a student now.

The word 'scholar' is not commonly used to mean 'student' in this context. 'Student' is the appropriate pronoun to describe someone currently studying.

× I have recently joined cooking classes because I am very interested in cooking.

✓ I have recently joined cooking classes because I am very interested in cooking.

This sentence is correct; no correction needed.

× Of course, when I joined, cooking classes will be very fresh and relaxed because the environment is very friendly and all people talk very spectacularly and kind of.

✓ Of course, when I joined, cooking classes were very fresh and relaxed because the environment was very friendly and all the people spoke very pleasantly and kindly.

The sentence mixes past and future tenses incorrectly. Since 'when I joined' refers to the past, the verbs should be in the past tense ('were', 'was', 'spoke'). Also, 'spectacularly' is incorrect here; 'pleasantly' or 'kindly' better describes how people talk.

× Of course, when I joined, cooking classes will be very fresh and relaxed because the environment is very friendly and all people talk very spectacularly and kind of.

✓ Of course, when I joined, cooking classes were very fresh and relaxed because the environment was very friendly and all the people spoke very pleasantly and kindly.

The adverb 'spectacularly' is inappropriate to describe how people talk. 'Pleasantly' or 'kindly' are more suitable adverbs in this context.

× As I already mentioned that this is very environment friendly and all people talk. Too Very kind of. That is why I like the place.

✓ As I already mentioned, this is a very environment-friendly place and all the people talk very kindly. That is why I like the place.

The phrase 'very environment friendly' needs an article and hyphenation: 'a very environment-friendly place'. The sentence 'Too Very kind of' is incomplete and unclear; it is corrected to 'all the people talk very kindly' to convey the intended meaning.

× But I have recently completed my senior family studies, so now I take a mission in Bcom in the University of Ludhiana.

✓ I have recently completed my senior family studies, so now I am pursuing a BCom degree at the University of Ludhiana.

The phrase 'take a mission in Bcom' is incorrect. The correct expression is 'pursuing a BCom degree'. Also, 'in the University' should be 'at the University'. The present continuous tense 'am pursuing' fits the current action better.