Work— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Improve clarity and grammar by using correct prepositions and verb forms. Also, avoid redundancy and keep the answer concise. For example, say "I have a part-time job at a pizza shop because I take care of my 6-year-old daughter on weekdays."

例: I have a part-time job at a pizza shop because I take care of my 6-year-old daughter during the weekdays.

提案: Focus on sentence structure and vocabulary. Use linking words to connect ideas and avoid repetition. For example, "I work at a pizza shop, and I really enjoy my job because the environment is calm and friendly. I take orders and serve food to customers."

例: I work at a pizza shop, and I really enjoy my job because the environment is calm and friendly. I take orders and serve food to customers.

提案: Improve coherence and vocabulary. Use linking words and clear expressions. For example, "Yes, it is a good place to work because the environment is pleasant and my colleagues are friendly. Overall, I feel comfortable there."

例: Yes, it is a good place to work because the environment is pleasant and my colleagues are friendly. Overall, I feel comfortable there.

提案: Use clearer sentence structure and correct grammar. Avoid repetition and be specific. For example, "Yes, I like my workplace because my colleague is very supportive and a nice person. I feel comfortable and enjoy her company."

例: Yes, I like my workplace because my colleague is very supportive and a nice person. I feel comfortable and enjoy her company.

提案: Clarify your ideas and use correct tenses. Use linking words to organize your answer. For example, "In the future, I plan to open my own pizza shop because I find it fascinating and I have the necessary skills."

例: In the future, I plan to open my own pizza shop because I find it fascinating and I have the necessary skills.

× Well I have a part time job at a pizza sharp becauses during the week days I take care of my 6 year old daughter.

✓ Well, I have a part-time job at a pizza shop because during the weekdays I take care of my 6-year-old daughter.

The word 'sharp' is incorrect; it should be 'shop' which is the correct noun for a place selling pizza. 'Becauses' is a misspelling of 'because'. 'Week days' should be one word 'weekdays'. Also, 'part time' should be hyphenated as 'part-time' when used as an adjective. '6 year old' should be hyphenated as '6-year-old' when used as an adjective.

× Well well I work at a pizza shop and I I really enjoyed my job becauses because the environment is the calm and friendly and I get is some order and some sharing food food to customer.

✓ Well, I work at a pizza shop and I really enjoy my job because the environment is calm and friendly and I get some orders and share food with customers.

The phrase 'I really enjoyed' should be 'I really enjoy' to match the present tense context. 'Becauses because' is redundant; only 'because' is needed. 'The calm and friendly' should be 'calm and friendly' without 'the'. 'I get is some order' is incorrect; it should be 'I get some orders'. 'Some sharing food food to customer' is incorrect; it should be 'share food with customers'.

× Yes, definitely it is a good place when where I work because the environment is very good and the all people conversation is you good way away behavioral very good. Overall it is a pleasant place to work where I feel comforted.

✓ Yes, definitely it is a good place where I work because the environment is very good and all the people’s conversation is in a good way and their behavior is very good. Overall, it is a pleasant place to work where I feel comfortable.

The phrase 'when where' is redundant; only 'where' is needed. 'The all people' should be 'all the people'. 'Conversation is you good way away behavioral very good' is unclear and incorrect; it should be 'conversation is in a good way and their behavior is very good'. 'Comforted' should be 'comfortable' to express feeling at ease.

× Yes, definitely I would like a place where I work because my old colleague, our friend so very supportive and and it is a it is a really nice person. So I really confortable with her and I love her company.

✓ Yes, definitely I like the place where I work because my old colleague, our friend, is very supportive and she is a really nice person. So I am really comfortable with her and I love her company.

The phrase 'I would like a place where I work' is better as 'I like the place where I work' to express current feeling. 'Our friend so very supportive' is incorrect; it should be 'our friend is very supportive'. 'It is a it is a really nice person' is incorrect; 'she is a really nice person' is correct. 'Confortable' is misspelled; correct spelling is 'comfortable'.

× Well, my future work plan, I started my own vision and see like a like a pizza. I I would be pizza shop open to pizza shop because it is a it is really fascinating to me and I understand this about the skills so so I think that in the future time I started my own work.

✓ Well, my future work plan is to start my own business, like a pizza shop. I would like to open a pizza shop because it is really fascinating to me and I understand the skills required. So, I think that in the future I will start my own work.

The sentence uses past tense 'started' incorrectly when referring to future plans; it should be 'is to start'. 'Vision and see like a like a pizza' is unclear; corrected to 'business, like a pizza shop'. 'I would be pizza shop open to pizza shop' is incorrect; corrected to 'I would like to open a pizza shop'. 'In the future time I started my own work' should be 'in the future I will start my own work' to express future intention.