Internet— Part 1 Informe

Sugerencia: 回答中存在语法错误，如“in my 12 years old”应为“when I was 12 years old”，且表达不够简洁自然。建议注意时态和句子结构，避免冗余。

Ejemplo: I started using the internet when I was 12 years old because my father bought a computer for our home. I mainly used it for studying and entertainment.

Sugerencia: 回答较为自然，但最后一句表达不够准确，“for relax”应为“to relax”。建议使用正确的动词不定式表达目的，并注意句子流畅。

Ejemplo: I go online many times a day, usually for both study and leisure. For example, I check my emails and messages in the morning, and I also watch short videos online to relax.

Sugerencia: 回答不连贯且语法混乱，信息表达不清晰。建议简洁明了地回答问题，避免重复和语法错误。

Ejemplo: Yes, about a year after my father bought the first computer, my parents limited my internet use because my eyesight was getting worse.

Sugerencia: 回答中有语法错误和重复，如“many for many hours”，且表达不够流畅。建议注意句子结构和词汇搭配，避免重复。

Ejemplo: Yes, I spend too much time online. I often chat with my friends on WeChat or watch short videos for several hours, which affects my productivity and study efficiency.

Sugerencia: 回答内容具体，但有重复“near the lake near the lake”，且“fragment technology”表达不准确。建议避免重复，使用更准确的词汇。

Ejemplo: Without the internet, I would spend my weekends reading a book in the beautiful park near my apartment. Sitting on a bench by the lake helps me focus without the distractions of technology.

× I started using computers when I was in my 12 years old.

✓ I started using computers when I was 12 years old.

“in my 12 years old” 是错误的表达，正确的说法是“when I was 12 years old”，表示年龄时不需要介词“in”以及所有格“my”。

× My father bought the computer for our home.

✓ My father bought a computer for our home.

这里提到的是某一台电脑，使用不定冠词“a”更合适，表示一台电脑，而不是特指某台电脑。

× I usually used the computer for some studying and entertainment.

✓ I usually used the computer for studying and entertainment.

“some studying”中“studying”作为不可数名词时不需要“some”，直接使用“studying”即可。

× Also, I will browse online such as short videos for relax.

✓ Also, I will browse online, such as watching short videos to relax.

“for relax”用法错误，应该用动词不定式“to relax”表示目的，同时“browse online such as short videos”不完整，需补充动词“watching”来说明浏览内容。

× MMM yes, I yes, I can't remember what time that about one year after my father purchased the first computer for our home, I got used to surfing the Internet through computer about almost every day, but my eyesight was getting worse and worse so my parents.

✓ MMM yes, I can't remember exactly when, but about one year after my father purchased the first computer for our home, I got used to surfing the Internet on the computer almost every day. However, my eyesight was getting worse and worse, so my parents...

原句结构混乱，重复“yes”，缺少连贯性和完整句子，需拆分成多个句子并调整词序，使表达清晰。

× I usually surf the Internet for studying and entertainment, but I find I often such as chatting with my friends through WeChat or scrolling short videos online for many for many hours every day.

✓ I usually surf the Internet for studying and entertainment, but I find I often chat with my friends through WeChat or scroll through short videos online for many hours every day.

“such as chatting”用法不当，应该直接用动词“chat”表示动作，同时“scrolling”应改为动词原形“scroll”与“chat”保持一致。

× I think this affect my productivity and study efficiency.

✓ I think this affects my productivity and study efficiency.

主语是第三人称单数“this”，谓语动词应加-s，变为“affects”，以保持主谓一致。

× Well, there is a beautiful park near my apartment, so on weekends I usually take a book with me.

✓ Well, there is a beautiful park near my apartment, so on weekends I usually take a book with me.

该句语法正确，无需修改。

× I sit on the bench near the lake near the lake in the park.

✓ I sit on the bench near the lake in the park.

“near the lake”重复出现，应删除重复部分，使句子简洁。

× I think this can help me stay focused without the fragment technology in short videos.

✓ I think this can help me stay focused without the fragmented technology in short videos.

“fragment”是名词或动词，形容词应为“fragmented”，表示“碎片化的”，用来修饰“technology”。